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Fingering and Precum. Scared to death.

Nov 16, 2008

I had a massage done by a male masseur who did it in the nude. When he took off his clothes, I noticed he touched his penis while taking off his shorts - I didn't see any precum. After about 10 minutes of regular massage with massage lotion, he began fingering me. He used a glove. But my question is that if he had touched his penis after putting on the glove, and there was precum on it, could I have gotten infected? I later confirmed he is HIV positive (with an undetectable viral load). He told me this information when I asked him a few days after the fact. He was never really hard so I don't think there was precum but I have a wife and we have unprotected sex and I cant bear the guilt and the possibility of hurting her. I don't believe he ever touched his penis after the initial start of the massage, but if he had touched it, could I have been infected? Also note that he never was stroking himself. One thing I can add, is that I know for sure he didn't touch his penis probably 4 to 5 minutes before insertion because I flipped on my back and saw everything from that moment on. Please help me. I will gladly make another donation. I'm wondering if I need to test, if there was exposure risk. Scared in NY.

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello Scared in NY,

Relax Max. Your HIV-acquisition risk is essentially nonexistent. There is no reason to undergo HIV testing from a medical perspective. However, if my reassurance fails to shake your worries, you could get a single HIV test at the three-month mark to put your (unwarranted) worries permanently to rest. The results will undoubtedly be negative. Your real problem is not HIV, but rather guilt. I'd recommend leveling with your wife. It's not only the best way to conquer your guilt; it's also the right thing to do.

Thank you for your donations to the Robert James Frascino AIDS Foundation. They are warmly appreciated and urgently needed.

Be well. Stay well.

Dr. Bob

need help

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