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Hey Good Doctor Bob-ster
Sep 13, 2008

Hey Dr Bob,

thought I'd join the crew of wrecked heads and ask a question myself. Anyway I am a worried fella from Ireland and a cupla years ago had a quick unprotected penetration with a woman one breezy night. She had dropped her drawers and I had put on a wee sheath and all and had been probing away like a young jockey for a while ya know? Anyway, obviously cos the condom was the wrong size it came off and I fired my chopper in for a minute anyway like a dosy Leprachaun. Well I was grand for a few months after and for some reason ever since I've been truely petrified and suffering some of those classic worry symptoms. Mine involve chronic sinusitis every day of the week, constant pressure, achy muscles and behind knees, can't lean on my arms without getting pins and needles and also buzzing and prickling for no reason. I also have a painless lump on the floor of mouth(the dentist the other day said he doesn't think it is anything to worry about) plus I just haven't been myself due to "malaise" Do you think I should worry, can you send me down some of that love like you do for worried pups like meself. In return I promise to set forth on a mission to end riverdancing in the States. Is it a deal?

Slainte' MaCara(cheers my friend)

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello Slainté,

You promise to end that ever-so-annoying Riverdancing??? No more bouncy-bouncy kick-kick??? Deal! I'll answer!

Unprotected sex does place you at some degree of risk for STDs, including HIV. There really is no way around that. Hence, you need an HIV-antibody test at the three-month mark. (No way around that either.)

"Symptoms" are notoriously unreliable in predicting who is and is not HIV infected. So stop worrying about symptoms. The reason to test and/or worry is potential exposure (risk), not symptoms or lack thereof. Your particular symptoms, by the way, are not suggestive of or worrisome for HIV acute retroviral syndrome (ARS)

I'll gladly send you my good-luck karma that your definitive three-month HIV-antibody test is negative, OK?

Hey, since you're going to get rid of Michael Flatley, any chance you can get rid of Enya as well?

Dr. Bob



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