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Concerned!
Sep 8, 2008

Hey,

My boyfriend knows I am HIV+! Tonight when we were having sexual relationship as he pulled out for he had reached his climax. We noticed that his condom had come off inside of me as he was pulling out. I am scared that now he might be infected also and what are the chance? Even though he keeps saying that it's ok and fine because he knows and saw it come off as he was pulling out. I am still terrified, simply because I wouldn't want him or anyone to get it because of me.I am making him go get tested on Monday! But please tell me what are the chance? I know I might also sound ignorant saying this but I had not reached my climax point and I remember my GYN telling us that the chance are low if the woman doesn't climax and accidents happen. Is this also true? Please help I am scared and concerned I love him and wouldn't want to hurt him or ruin his life the way mine was even though he knows I am + and has excepted and loves me regardless.

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello,

If indeed the condom slipped off while your partner was slipping out (of you), the HIV-transmission risk is essentially non-existent, as there would not have been any direct exposure.

If you and/or your partner are concerned there might have been an exposure, getting tested "on Monday" makes no sense. HIV-antibody tests taken prior to the three-month mark are not considered to be definitive or conclusive. So if your boyfriend needs a test, he'll have to wait three months from the date of last possible exposure to get an accurate result.

I would suggest you and your boyfriend read the chapters in the archives of this forum devoted to magnetic couples, HIV sexual transmission, HIV sexual prevention and safer sexual techniques. I'm confident you'll find the information enlightening and reassuring.

Finally, the information your gynecologist told you is just plain wrong.

Dr. Bob



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