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HIV+ & HAD UNPROTECTED SEX
Aug 26, 2008

Hi Doc,

I'm hiv+ and met this guy a few months ago and we went out for drinks one night, then he took me home, the same night we had sex in his car without using protection. So, I have been feeling very sick lately, tired, nausea and a painful throat. I feel very weak. I'm on ARV's. The guy is negative and I haven't had a chance to tell him about my status. I know I've been selfish, but the sex wasn't planned it just happened. Do you think it's the reason I'm feeling this way? Am I minimising my living days by doing this? What's happening to my body? Please tell me what to do, I'm very scared. Do you think I infected him? Please help, I'm confused and very sick.

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hi,

Do I think you infected him? I have no way of answering that question other than to say that since you both decided to have unprotected and since he is HIV negative, there was risk involved in your automotive-antics, especially if you dipped your dipstick to check his oil (so to speak). If your antiretroviral drugs have driven your HIV plasma viral load to undetectable levels, the chance of HIV transmission decreases significantly.

As for your current symptoms, certainly they could result form feeling guilty, stressed or depressed over this incident. However, there are many other reasons you could be feeling sick as well.

More than likely, you already know what my advice is going to be, but here it is nonetheless.

1. Man up and level with your trick. You obviously know this is the right thing to do. It's also the best way for you to confront your guilt. If you absolutely can't summon up the courage to tell him, go to your local health department. They can use the anonymous partner notification system to advise your buddy he's been exposed and needs to get tested without using your name.

2. See your HIV doctor for an evaluation of your current symptoms.

You knew I was going to advise these two things, didn't you. Of course you did. So now it's time to get them done!

Good luck.

Dr. Bob



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