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night out with wife, extremely anxious

Jul 5, 2008

Hi Doc. Bob

First let me thank you for your answer, even though after reading a lot of your answers I knew what you wero going to answer, it is reasuring to have your own answer,,, also thank you for teaching me how symptoms is writen!

I dont want to keep with this, even my wife is very calm after reading all of this, but I cant seem to stop being anxious and scared, it is the fever and sore troat and cough my wife got at 15 days that drives me crazy she is ok now after 5 days and medicine, even though I have read a lot that one should not use this SYMPTOMS to predict anything. I have read there are no cases registered of geting the hiv virus thru fingers, is this true? As Promised donation has been made,, I hope at the 3 month test everything is ok, and that I dont forget how important is to to have someone doing what you do.

Hope you have an excenllent time in mexico leave some margaritas for us!

Response from Dr. Frascino


Thanks for your thanks and for your donation to the Robert James Frascino AIDS Foundation ( Both are warmly appreciated. I'm delighted your wife is "very calm after reading" my response. Unfortunately, you continue to be "anxious and scared." Your concerns about your wife's fever, sore throat and cough are unwarranted. These types of symptoms are incredibly common and associated with many illnesses including the common cold! To immediately assume they must be cause by HIV acute retroviral syndrome is equivalent to saying every minor headache must be related to terminal brain cancer! As for HIV transmission via fingering, HIV cannot permeate intact skin on the fingers or elsewhere. I am not aware of any documented cases of HIV transmission resulting from fingering. Perhaps it's time you had a margarita or two to help you calm down a bit and gain a better perspective on this whole situation. I remain confident all will turn out well, OK?

Good luck.

Dr. Bob

night out with wife, extremely anxious Jul 3, 2008

Dear Dr.Bob

Three weeks ago I went to brasil with my wife we went out to some bars and finaly hired a sex worker and took her back with us,, we have been married for 14 years and have never done anything like this before,, The three of us kissed, and licked ,, there was no penetration what so ever and oral was limited to her licking the sides of my penis, she did not get it in her mouth. My worries are because my wife puted her fingers inside her vagina, and she puted her fingers in my wifes vagina, my wife checked her fingers and had no cuts what so ever, really checked well. I have read a lot of your answers and were very reasuring as I see that risk in that kind of encouter is extremely low. The problem is that exactly 15 days after the encounter, my wife started having pain in her throat,the next day got a fever and body ache, the fever was gone after day and a half but the throat still hurts after 3 days,, she`s had a very bad cough for this 3 days although its much better today, we had an hiv test at day 15,,(negative) I know this is not conclusive , what do you think about this sinthoms,, I am extremely anxious, have trouble going to work or watching my kids. Should I be this worried or was this really a very low risk encounter,, what about the sinthoms?

Thank you doctor I really will apreciate your answer, also will make contribution as I think you help a lot,,, how can I do it from mexico?

Response from Dr. Frascino


You essentially answered your own question by reciting what you learned by reading the archives!

The HIV-acquisition risk from the activities you describe is extremely remote at best. Symptoms (or "sinthoms") are notoriously unreliable in predicting who is or is not HIV infected. There are a great many illnesses that can cause symptoms identical to those your wife experienced. If you remain worried, get a single HIV-antibody test at the three-month mark. The results will undoubtedly be negative.

Donation information for the Robert James Frascino AIDS Foundation can be found on the foundation's Web site at The foundation accepts credit cards, PayPal, checks, cashier's checks, direct-wire bank transfers, appreciated securities, cash, etc.

The foundation's address is:

The Robert James Frascino AIDS Foundation 1000 Fremont Ave., Suite 145 Los Altos, CA 94024

Thank you for your willingness to help others in desperate need. In return, I'm sending you my good-luck/good-health karma. Don't worry; I'm confident all is well (including you and your wife!)

Next month, I'll be visiting Mexico, Mexico City to be exact. I'll be attending the International AIDS Conference and enjoying excellent fajitas and margaritas.

Hasta la vista.

Dr. Bob

Syrian Guy Again!!
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