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I'll swap you piece of mind for donation?
Jul 1, 2008

Hi dr. Bob. You are my hero. I read your forum everyday but I have not found a similar question to mine.. I am an 18 year old South African girl and I am sexually active with my boyfriend of a year. We do have protected sex in all instances except oral sex. This guy was a total virgin before this, never injected drugs, his mother is not sick and he has never had a blood transfusion. He does, however, live in a university residence whereby shower and toilet facilities are shared. What if he showered after someone masturbated in the shower? He also goes clubbing quite often and gets drunk, what if someone pricked him with a needle and he didn't feel cos he was drunk? He also shares joints of marijuana with people as well as cups and eating utensils, is that risky? Finally he shared an electric razor with his friends the other day, like the one hairdressers use, to shave his hair the other day. He used it within 5 mins of the previous person- risk or not? Other than this he lives his life as a typical university student. Should i be worried about getting hiv or anything else from this guy? I've got my donation ready, but please dr. Bob, i need an answer. I am quite quickly going insane.

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello South African Gal,

If indeed you have been reading this forum every day, you would know that HIV is not transmitted by casual contact. Your fears about shared showers and toilets, going clubbing, sharing joints, sharing eating utensils and cups or using an electric razor are all completely unwarranted and irrational. If my reassurance and all the posts in the archives addressing similar concerns aren't enough to completely calm your fears, you should consider seeking some professional counseling to help you confront and conquer these totally unwarranted worries, as they could easily ruin not only this relationship but many future relationships as well.

Finally, regarding donations to The Robert James Frascino AIDS Foundation (www.concertedeffort.org), thank you. However, please note I do not swap advice for donations. My advice here is free and available to all, whether or not they feel inclined to make a donation to my foundation. Donations should always be made in the true spirit of generosity, compassion and sincere desire to help those in need. Donation pledges or promises do not influence which questions get chosen for posting. You now have your response. Please don't feel compelled to make a donation you don't truly believe in, OK?

Be well. Stop worrying.

Dr. Bob



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