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SCARY SPICE
Mar 3, 2008

Hello My Doctor friend Bob,

Its me again! The one who oral tested at "just over" 11 weeks and is now too scared to go back. My mother calls me Dizzy Lizzy and my "Sissy" friend calls me Scary Spice.

Now we have discussed that no one should diagnose themselves based on symptoms. But DR. Bob, since about 2wks after the mistake with "Recycle man" I got flu like symptoms, achy groin, twitches all over, and lmyphnode issues. I went to the doc and he did an ultrasound under my arms and it came back normal. But I still have twitches and I feel like something is goin on under my arms! Also I failed to mention that around that time I had also gotten a small rash on the side of my neck and diarhea.

So like i have said b4 I tested at 5,8, and "just over" 11 weeks. All test were oral rapid tests. Now, I still twitch just not as much, and I have always had hip problems beause I am a runner, but now the hip pain feels different. So this is why I am being the Lion from the wizzard of oz!!

My doc says there is really nothing that leads him to believe I am positive. Another doc had some blood work done and my count was 3.6 and some lymph number was 53??? She said that 46 was high but mine was 53, she also said they dont worry til it gets into the 100s! She said that at the time the blood was drawn I was probably fighting something, so you KNOW what Im thinkin!!Now follow me if you will... I just had some more blood work done with the doc who told me he sees no indication of me being positive and that all my blood work was normal. I have had a low count b4 but my doc told me that for some reason african americans tend to run on he lower side of the scale. But that this time it was normal.

"Recycle man" told me he is negative, but lets be real. He lies which is one reason why I dumped him! But wow he use to be so good in bed, thats about all he was good for. Oops okay sorry, gettin off the subject.

Okay now that you know the BIG picture do you STILL think "just over" 11 weeks negative is encouraging?????? Aha got cha! I bet you dont now!

As I said b4 I am on meds now for anxiety bcus of this!! It's been 10 mos since the experience with "recycle man" and Im so convinced that I am positive based on ALL those symptoms! I want to find HIM knock him over the head and make HIM take the test!!!!! But he's bigger and stronger so thats not an option. So I will be Scary Spice for a lil longer then I will go test AGAIN!! I REALLY want my life back!!!!

Wow I feel better now. Thanks for listening! If you have anything to add to ALL the help you have sent my way please dont be shy. You amaze me!! Love ya mean it Dude!!!!!!!

Response from Dr. Frascino

Dear Dizzy Lizzy Sissy Scary Spice,

My assessment and advice remain absolutely unchanged.

There is nothing more I can offer you. The next step is yours.

I'll await your WOO-HOO. (Yes, I remain confident you are negative.) Don't make me wait too long!

Dr. Bob

You Are So Awesome!! (NEGATIVE TEST AT 11 WEEKS) Feb 26, 2008

Dr Bob, You are amazing! I feel like I know you. The way you break things down is so cool. I will definately be donating! Tell me what you think. I had an unprotected experience with a recycled boyfriend that lasted for SERIOUSLY 20 seconds before I made him TAKE IT OUT!! 2 wks later was the start of every symptom in the book. I wont bore you with the details. My doc told me to get tested at 3 mos. So I did the rapid at 5 wks, 8wks, and just over 11wks. All of which were neg. The thought of taking another test freaks me out to the point that I cant even begin to tell you! I have seen a shrink and I am even on medication for anxiety bcus of this whole thing. My question is this, my last rapid oral was done at jus over 11 wks. I have just about every symptom. Should I test again? My doc says no but I wont feel better until I hear from you. Wether I hear from you or not I still think you are the bomb and I will donate! Love ya mean it!!!! U R MY HERO

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hi,

Recycled boyfriends are always trouble. (That's why you dumped him in the first place, right?!)

Unprotected sex does place you at some degree of risk for STDs, including HIV. I absolutely agree with your doctor's advice. HIV tests taken prior to the three-month mark are not considered to be definitive or conclusive. So he told you to get tested at three months. Instead you got tested at 5 weeks, 8 weeks and 11 weeks. Hmm . . . exactly which part of "get tested at 3 months" didn't you understand?

Sure I know the window period can be anxiety provoking. (That's why we say use condoms: So you won't have to endure this type of very avoidable worry!) I'm glad you are getting psychological support and taking anti-anxiety medication to help.

Regarding symptoms even "every symptom in the book" they are notoriously unreliable in predicting who is and is not HIV infected. A negative FDA-approved HIV-antibody test taken outside the window period trumps symptoms each and every time.

So what about your three negative tests out to 11 weeks? Well, 11 weeks is not three months; however, the immune system is not a calendar or a stopwatch either. I can't change the published guidelines that state HIV tests taken prior to three months are not considered to be definitive. If I made an exception for you, I would have to make the same exception for everyone else. Then the standard would be 11 weeks rather than a full three months. If that were the case, I can assure you another anxious wreck would write in within moments asking me if his or her 10.5-weeks negative result merited a WOO-HOO. Obviously you can see where this is going. So, the three-month guideline remains intact! (At least for now.) That said, I can tell you that your negative tests at 5, 8 and "just over 11" weeks are extremely encouraging and so close to the guideline recommendation of three months that I would assume you are HIV negative. If you want to make it official, get a rapid HIV test at three months (or more). The results are available in as few as 20 minutes. It will undoubtedly be negative and should put any residual fears and worries you may be harboring permanently to rest, OK?

Finally, me "the bomb?" Nah, I'm more like a peace symbol.

Dr. Bob

No Really You Are The Bomb! Feb 28, 2008

Dr Bob,

I cant say that you have missed your calling, because I know that in this life you are doing exactly what I believe God has called you to do! But I will say that you need to add comedian to your list. The whole straight jacket guy response was priceless!!

Okay on a serious note, I truly hope you realize how you help and inspire people. I am the one who is living in fear. I rapid tested negative at "just over" 11 weeks but now im terrified of going back to test again!!! I know I will because reading your forum is like therapy for me. Everyday I log on and I get help from you just by reading the questions and responses, and it helps me to move a little closer to testing again to get the definate result.It has now been 10 mos since unprotected sex with the recycled boyfriend. I think the reason I tested in the 11th wk and not the 12th wk was because I was afraid of the true result which in my little sicko mind (due to all the symptoms I had and am STILL having) would be positive. But now Ive screwed myself because I am drowning in fear!! Is that workin for me......not so much. My life has stopped because I have allowed fear to cripple me. On a good note Dr Bob I thank you sooooooo much for sendin me the Karma gift! You are a blessing and sooner than later I will get past this fear, get tested and get my life back. An 11 wk negative result should have been extremley encouraging to me but instead I remain jailed in fear. Oh well, I will get there soon I hope. Please dont EVER stop doin what you do! And yes wether you like it or not!You ARE the bomb!!

By the way you and you partner make a fabulous couple!! Love ya mean it dude!

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hi,

God called me to be wise-assed cyber-sexpert with a twisted sense of humor??? OK, if you say so. The higher power beyond the Pearly Gates must have one helluva sense of humor. Oops, perhaps I shouldn't use the word "hell" in my description of HER! In reality I really don't know what the higher powers had in store for me, but I can tell you in this life I am doing exactly what I believe I should be doing. (Hopefully SHE'll be pleased as well.)

Now what's all this nonsense about being too afraid to get tested??? With negative tests out to "just over" 11 weeks, your chances of being positive are about as good as Mary Cheney's chances of a three-way with the Bush Twins. How else can I advise you to just get tested? How about this? I suggest you Netflix the Wizard of Oz and watch it, paying particular attention to the role of the Cowardly Lion. If that doesn't give you enough courage to get tested, we may have to move on to the movie Moonstruck. I'll come to your house dressed like Cher and you'll be playing the Nicholas Cage role. I'll then bitch-slap you while yelling, "Snap out of it!!!" That maneuver never fails!

Look, a rapid test takes only 20 minutes to get a result. In your case that's 20 minutes to get a WOO-HOO. So what are you waiting for? The rest of your life is waiting for you. Wasting even a nanosecond of it paralyzed by completely unwarranted irrational fear is a "sin" in my book (and those Higher Powers won't be pleased either).

I'll be waiting for your WOO-HOO.

Dr. Bob

Just a comment Feb 29, 2008

Hey Dr. Bob,

Maybe I should hold off on testing for a while. Cus the thought of you dressing up in drag as Cher and bitch slapping me is too funny to let go of!!! You would indeed make a fabulous Cher!

Okay I get it. I MUST test again to move on because my life is waiting. The sooner the better. I am still afraid but with your help I am gettin there. And without a doubt you will be the first to know. It's the least I can do since I have taken up your time! But atleast I haven't asked if I can catch HIV from a chicken bone!

But I just need you to tell me one more time. Even though I was negative at "just over" 11 weeks I have had just about EVERY symptom in the book. Its been 10 mos since unprotected mistake with recycle man and I am STILL having all the symptoms!! Symptoms are not a way to tell wether you are infected or not. Right?? RIGHT! Never mind I answered my own question. You see I am learning. Now I just have to get my scarey ass to a testing spot!! Yikes!!

Thanks for EVERYTHING Dr. BOB. You really are my hero!! Smooches to you. Love ya mean it Dude!!

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hi,

Yes, you did answer your own question (correctly, too, I might add!). That's one less time I'll need to repeat "symptoms, no matter what they are, are notoriously unreliable in predicting who is and is not HIV infected!" Oops! I wound up saying it anyway. Damn. I guess I really am becoming "The Department of Redundancy Department."

Thanks for the smooches, but if you really love me and want to make me happy, get your ass ("scarey" or otherwise) to a test site and send me the wonderful (and completely predictable) news that you are negative so we can yell WOO-HOO and I can get out of this Cher drag, which I can assure you is far more frightening than the bitch-slap.

Dr. Bob



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