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Nov 16, 2007

hey doc..

i masterbate 3 times a day :S, im doing a method that increases your penis lenght is there a nother way of doing it and does 2 much masterbation cause my penis to shrink?

Response from Dr. Frascino


You are masturbating three times a day "doing a method that increases your penis "lenght". Hmm . . . and just where did you find out about this method? Perhaps the "Journal of Irreproducible Results"??? And with this masturbating method of supersizing your schlong you are asking me if too much masturbation can cause your penis to shrink??????? So am I to assume that your three-times-a-day tallywhacker tug isn't giant-izing Mr. Happy??? Wow, what a surprise!

Dude, burping the nephew as often as you want will not alter the size of your home entertainment center one way or the other. OK? (See below).

Dr. Bob

Masturbation (MASTURBATION) Nov 2, 2007

what are the side effects of masturbating?

Response from Dr. Frascino


This is an HIV/AIDS information Web site, not a remedial sex education site for those unlucky enough to have been subjected to an abstinence-only sex education course. However, I have addressed this question numerous times before and will post some of these responses below for your edification. Do spread this information on to the other kids in your class, OK?

Dr. Bob

Will Masturbation Shrink The Penis? (MASTURBATION) (MASTURBATION) Aug 25, 2007

Well I have been masturbating alot recently and my penis looks like is has shrunk. Doctor can this happen?

To Add To My Last Question Im worried its shrunk and my dad said i might get elephantitus? im only 12 will masturbation shrink the penis or cause harm to it?

Response from Dr. Frascino


Your dad said what???? That masturbation would cause elephantiasis??? Hmmm . . . you're worried your penis is shrinking and your dad is worried your dick is going to be the size of Jumbo the Elephant? Your family seems to have size issues when it comes to Mr. Happys.

Listen up, masturbation is completely normal and healthy. Years of scientific research have not found any negative side effects from burping the nephew (masturbating). Your dad is wrong. Maybe he just wants you not to spend so much time locked in the bathroom staring at the Victoria Secret (or Calvin Klein underwear) ads. I'll reprint some information about masturbation from the archives below. There are absolutely no medical reasons you should not enjoy your "home entertainment center" (masturbation) and you can tell your dad I said so, OK?

Dr. Bob

Wanking (MASTURBATION) Jul 27, 2007

what effects does wanking have on you?

Response from Dr. Frascino


Another QTND (Question That Never Dies). See below, sticky fingers.

Dr. Bob

does jacking off cause acne or make it worse (MASTURBATION) Jul 18, 2007

i hear people say that jacking off cause pimples and or makes it worse is this true

Response from Dr. Frascino


Congratulations. By asking this question again, you have now moved it into the category of QTND (Questions That Never Die).

See below.

Dr. Bob

does masterbation cause acne Aug 21, 2006

my friends recently told me that if i masterbate it will cause an increase in acne is that true

Response from Dr. Frascino


Your friends told you what??? Hmmm . . . . Are your friends pimply pusses themselves? I would guess either (1) your friends are pulling your leg, trying to make you feel guilty about pulling something else or (2) your friends come from very religious (read: sexually frustrated) families and are enrolled in a Bush-sponsored abstinence-only sex education course. Either way, your friends are shooting you a load of misinformation about shooting a load. I'll repost some questions about masturbation from the archives that address the acne connection as well as other myths about choking the trouser snake. You can use the information to educate your pals so they can stop stock piling Clearasil Ultra just in case!

Dr. Bob


Sep 22, 2005

What is the truth about side-effects of Masturbation. I heard people saying that it might stunt your growth, etc.

Response from Dr. Frascino


Masturbation stunting growth??? Gosh, if that were true, I'd be two feet tall and working as part of the Lollypop Guild, welcoming folks to Munchkinland.

The only side effects of masturbation are feeling great and having sticky fingers. It will not turn you gay. You won't run out of semen. You won't get hairy palms. It won't make your eyesight go bad. It does not cause acne. It won't cause your penis to shrink. Masturbation is normal and it's healthy!

Stay well, Jack-a-roo! Dr. Bob

side-effects of masturbation

Feb 4, 2005

Does vigorous masturbation will result in HIVs or some STDs. Also what are the side-effects of masturbation.

Response from Dr. Frascino


No, despite what Sister Missionary Position might have taught you in Sunday school, masturbation does not result in HIV or STDs. What are the "side effects of masturbation?" well, let's see . . . ah . . . sticky fingers, feeling ecstatic, grunting or maybe screaming Oh My Goddddddd! and finally getting yelled at by your mom for being in the bathroom too long with the door locked.

Dr. Bob


Aug 12, 2006

I am really involved in masterbation for the past 5 years.Can this enable me to get children in future?(infertility). Is there any effects related to this?

Response from Dr. Frascino


". . . really involved in masturbation for the past 5 years . . ."??? WOW! You've got stamina! "Can this enable me to get children in the future?" Well, no. technically speaking you'll need to have sex with someone other than "Mrs. Palm and her 5 daughters" in order to produce offspring. Are there "any effects related to masturbation?" Hmmm . . . well yes, but you've probably experienced all these already. For instance:

1. Rapid shallow breathing, which increases in tempo as you reach the point of no return.

2. Involuntarily yelling "oh god, oh god, oh god, OHHHHH GODDDD . . . AUGHHHH!

3. Sticky fingers.

To seriously answer your questions:

1. Masturbation does not affect one's ability to conceive children. (No link to fertility or infertility.)

2. There are no detrimental effects from burping the nephew, except perhaps being yelled at by Mom for locking yourself in the bathroom for protracted periods of time.

Your questions do point out once again the astounding failure of our current sex education efforts!

Relax, guy. Enjoy your home entertainment center.

Dr. Bob


Jun 13, 2006 a male, and i have been masturbating everyday, twice a day for almost 4 years there a chance that i have hiv/aids?

Response from Dr. Frascino


No, for two reasons:

1. You can't give yourself something you don't already have (i.e. a million dollars or HIV, for instance).

2. When would you have time to contract a sexually transmitted illness when you spend so much time by yourself burping the nephew?

I'd suggest you put mini-me away for a while and spend some time reviewing the wealth of information on this site and related links that pertains to how HIV is and is not transmitted. But go wash your hands first, OK?

Dr. Bob

Wrong way (MASTURBATION) Feb 11, 2007

Here is a questions

1 can hiv start off for no aparent reason. No one is m family is HIV poz and I hadnt had sex yet do I have a chance of becoming HIV poz.

2. Can you get Aids from masturbating from the wrong way. I put my hand into a cylindrical form and then I do it. Am I in any danger.

3. Does masterbating caouse any STDS or disease.

I had bad education in sex-ed our teacher was horrible.

You are my hero seriously

Response from Dr. Frascino


Your questions once again dramatically point out the consequences of a "bad education in sex-ed.!" I hope all our readers will demand science-based factual sex-education be returned to our nation's classrooms immediately. Bush's "abstinence-only" sex-education is producing a dangerous information gap that can have disastrous consequences when horned-up kids begin having sex despite their virginity pledges and have no idea how to protect themselves from unwanted pregnancies or STDs!

Questioner retuning to you now, the answer at all your questions is a resounding "no!" For more details about masturbation, STDs and HIV, review the information in the archives. I'll re-post a few samples below that address your specific concerns.

Get informed. Stay safe and you'll stay sell.

Dr. Bob

Yet another asshole to bother you. Dec 10, 2006

hey dr bob i need to ask you something about masterbation

1. i have been jerkin my dick off everyday now is that bad.

2. do the ads on the internet say the truth about meds makeing you pepe bigger.

3. is there any kind of masterbation that makes you penis larger

4. how much times do you think i should masterbare per week.

5. do you masterbate alot dr bob if so i am ganna probbley guss how large your penis size is u look like u have a 11 or 10 incher

stay well dr bob


Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello Horned-Up Awan Afuqya,

1. Masturbation is not bad; it's completely normal.

2. See posts from archives below.

3. If there was, my dick would need its own zip code.

4. As many times as you want.

5. Yes, I do. As for size, well, let it suffice to say I am a full-blooded Italian.

Stay well, Sticky Fingers.

Dr. Bob

The proof: Masturbation is harmful Nov 1, 2006

Well, I was researching on masturbation a little and I think you might want to reconsider your stance on masturbation causing no harm.

Those two links have many more links. Even JackinWorld (supposedly the best resource on masturbation on the Internet) confirms that semen has large amounts of nutrients. And most people (if not all) ejaculate by masturbation.

What do you think? Surely the nutrients are not trivial.

Thanks for your time -Andrew

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello Andrew,

Proof??? What proof??? I see nothing in those posts or on Jackinworld that would indicate masturbation is harmful. In fact here is a direct quote from Jackinworld: " Is masturbation healthy? Masturbation is a healthy and normal practice, like daydreaming or napping. Even masturbating several times each day is completely harmless. You may encounter people, books, or websites that say masturbation is bad or harmful; this is just plain incorrect. As any reputable medical doctor will tell you, old myths about masturbation affecting the eyesight, causing permanent fatigue or insanity, etc., have long been disproved. In fact, recent studies suggest that ejaculating regularly isn't just fun, it can actually help prevent a certain kind of cancer later in life."

Next, the nutrient loss in a load of baby batter is indeed trivial. Spunk is a completely renewable substance! You don't run out of pee from taking a piss or snot from blowing your nose, do you? Well, the same principle applies to burping the nephew, except it's way more fun than taking a leak or expelling boogers. OK?????

Masturbation is normal and healthy. So just "grab your dick and double click" onto a more "stimulating" Web site and enjoy your home entertainment center without worry! Wanking is way more fun (and healthier) than worrying! In fact I may just take a sticky-fingers pause that refreshes right now!

Dr. Bob

masturbation causes tiredness and exhaustion? Mar 17, 2005

sir, i would like to know if masturbation causes tiredness and exhustion? if so, tell me a way to become fresh again without sleeping. also ,i would like to know if frequent masturbation would cause a problem in producing a baby later, when i have sexual intercourse?what is the suggested rate of masturbation per day and per week?

Response from Dr. Frascino


1. Does masturbation cause tiredness and exhaustion? That depends on how often and for how long you choke the chicken. Generally speaking, spanking the monkey is not in the same league as doing triathlons.

2. How can you "become fresh again without sleeping?" Dude, you've got to sleep once in a while. Give your home entertainment center a rest or you'll wind up with carpal tunnel syndrome. After all, you don't want to wear the little fellow out. He's got to last you a whole lifetime. By the way, not only do you need to sleep, but you also have to eat, exercise, work, change the kitty litter box, etc. Yes, I know, you can do many of these things "one handed," but . . . .

3. "Will frequent masturbation cause a problem in producing a baby later?" Technically, no. However, you do have to tuck it away long enough to meet a potential mate to make the baby with, right?

4. "What is the suggested rate of masturbation per day and per week?" That varies form person to person. If you are young and Italian . . . (Oh hell, I can already guess from your question that you are young and Italian) it would be a lot higher than if you are, say, Dick Cheney.

OK, now go wipe all the sticky icky stuff off your hands before you gunk up the computer again.

Dr. Bob

Masturbation Aug 1, 2007

I heard masturbating can make you grow taller is that true? Also not being very religious here but does masturbating makes you go to hell?

Response from Dr. Frascino


Does masturbation make you grow taller? No, absolutely not. I'm only 5'8" and if masturbating increased height, I would be at least as tall as the Empire State Building by now.

Does masturbating make you go to hell? No. Of course not. Why would we yell "OH GOD, OH GOD, OOOOOOHHH G-G-GOD, I'M COMING" when we jack off if it makes you go to hell? One would have to logically assume masturbators go in the other direction. I'm assuming you heard these absurd stories either in Bible school, at a Bush-Cheney-sanctioned "abstinence-only" sex education class, on Fox News or from your mom during your home schooling. Right??? Yeah, I thought so.

Relax, dude. "Burping the nephew" (masturbating) is totally normal. Take a read through the archives of this forum. We have a whole section devoted to jacking off. You should find the information there reassuring.

Dr. Bob

hard masturbation cause blindness Aug 9, 2007

i heard from a friend that if you jackoff to much you will go blind, is that true?

Response from Dr. Frascino


I'm sorry, but could you resend your question in Braille? Thanks.

Dr. Bob

Penis Enlargement (PENIS ENLARGEMENT) Apr 29, 2007

Hi Im 24 Years Old and My penis is 4inches so can you suggest me a doctor in Mumbai or any pills to enlarge my penis

Response from Dr. Frascino


You're 24 years-old and your tallywhacker is only four inches long? Oh, I wouldn't worry about a little thing like that . . . .

Kidding aside, although there are some surgical procedures that attempt to increase the length of Mr. Happys, I haven't seen very good results and would not recommend them. As for pills, no, these will not work. (See below.)

Dr. Bob

penis enlargement May 9, 2006

there are so many penis enlargement pills out there do any of them actually work?

Response from Dr. Frascino


Come on Dude, think it through. If any of these products worked, every guy would have a Mr. Happy so large it would require it's own zip codes rather than so many dudes having those tragic "head in the bushes" tiny weenies commonly found on Republican politicians.

Dr. Bob

penis enlargement Jul 23, 2006

are there any products that will actually increa se girth and length of the male penis?

Response from Dr. Frascino


Sure. Lots. For instance DVDs with titles like:

1. Shaving Ryan's Privates

2. For Your Thighs Only

3. Three Men and a Barbie

4. On Golden Blond

5. Sleepy Booty

6. You Got Male

7. The Joy Suck Club

8. I Know Who You Did Last Summer

9. Robin's Wood

10. Star Whores

11. Robocock

12. ET the Extra Testicle

13. Glad-He-Ate-Her

14. A Rear and Pleasant Danger

15. My Bare Lady

16. Sorest Rump

17. Saturday Night Beaver

18. Laurence of A Labia

19. Clity Clity Gang Bang

But I should warn you the "increase in girth and length" is only temporary.

Dr. Bob

Sawubona Mar 6, 2004

Dear Ebrahim, that is Bob in Arabic. Just wanted to to say Sawubona in Zulu to a great man. Thank you for all the advice and also the humour. (Now seriously about the penis enlargement advice - is it necesssary? Love you Ebrahim. The Zulu Warrior.

Response from Dr. Frascino


Well the last several Zulu warriors that I happened to see in the showers at the gym earlier today certainly did not need the penis enlargement procedure. Then again, maybe they already had had it done!?!

Dr. Ebrahim

Average time and maximum range b/w exposure and symptoms
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