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Mistake of My Life
Oct 28, 2007

Both my wife and I have very similar symptoms; Headaches, Fatigue, Diarreha, stomach grumblings and stomach spasms. These symptoms have lasted for 3 weeks. I had an affair 8 weeks ago, and during intercourse the condom feel off. I had also performed oral sex(to a woman). I tested at week 5, and the results were negative, and then tested again at week 7 and negative. I had intercourse with my wife at week 2. We both look very tired, and have dark circles under our eyes. We are both suffering from insomnia also. Recently I've been getting tingling feelings on my face. My wife doesn't know about my infedelity so I find it hard to think that ,it is just stress. I'm very worried. I also want to add that I've been seeing a doctor to watch me and my results. My dr. is not able to connect my symptoms to any flu or virus. My Dr. thinks it is just stress. If it were, I don't see why my wife would feel the same symptoms. Does ARS come in stages? Are there pre-symptoms to ARS? Are these symptoms consistent with the begining stages of HIV? I am very worried that I have HIV and that I have passed it on to my wife.

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello,

Your negative HIV results at five and seven weeks are extremely encouraging. The vast majority of HIV-positive folks will have detectable levels of anti-HIV antibodies in their blood by four to six weeks. I absolutely agree with your doctor: your symptoms are quite classic for anxiety, stress and depression. This is related not only to your irrational HIV fears, but also to your infidelity guilt.

My advice is simple:

1. Level with your wife. It's not only the best way to confront your guilt; it's also the right thing to do.

2. Get an HIV test (ELISA or rapid) at the three-month mark. The odds remain astronomically in your favor that you did not contract HIV from this indiscretion.

Good luck.

Dr. Bob



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