Advertisement
The Body: The Complete HIV/AIDS Resource
Follow Us Follow Us on Facebook Follow Us on Twitter Download Our App
Professionals >> Visit The Body PROThe Body en Espanol
Read Now: TheBodyPRO.com Covers AIDS 2014
   
Ask the Experts About

Safe Sex and HIV PreventionSafe Sex and HIV Prevention
           
Rollover images to visit our other forums!
Recent AnswersAsk a Question
  
  • Email Email
  • Glossary Glossary


LOL!!! You are hilarious! Also donation issue
Oct 24, 2007

Hey Dr. Bob,

I was just reading the archives (as you suggested) and I spewed hot tea all over my computer as I cracked up laughing. You, sir, are f**king hilarious!!!! A few of my favorites are cut/copied below.

I also wanted to thank you for putting a smile on my face for the first time since my diagnosis. I also have been trying to make a donation via credit card on your foundtion's website for a week without any luck. Am I doing something wrong?

Be Well. Stay Well (To quote a very wise man.)

Dexter

Semen Stained Undies

Nov 8, 2003

A guy sent me a pair of semen stained underwear in a ziplocked plastic baggie. It took ten days for them to reach me, and when I opened them, the semen stains were crusty but the material appeared to have absorbed the liquid and appeared damp. I deep sniffed the underwear for about five minutes and rubbed my nose --but not my mouth -- against them. About five days later I developed a low-grade recurring fever. What is the likelihood that there was a HIV virus transfer in this incident?

Response from Dr. Frascino:

Hello,

Gosh, a new use for Ziplock plastic bags! So tell me, did this guy just decide to send you his spunked-up boxers because he didn't know what else to get you for Valentine's Day? Or perhaps they were supposed to be delivered to the dry cleaners next door? Or did you order them as a novelty item to put in the office X-mas gift grab-bag? So, then you deep sniffed the jizzed Calvins for 5 minutes? Really? Now listen pal, I've heard about trying to "Shout" stains out, but never snort them out! On to your question HIV risk? None. Relax and take some deep breaths. (Oh, by the way, you might be able to breath a bit more easily if you stop using those crusty Fruit of the Looms as a gas mask! (By the way I do hope you know I'm only teasing your sexual pastime olfactory pleasure in all of its forms is definitely in the realm of safe sex). One final thought: I would not suggest re-gifting this item at X-mas time.

Dr. Bob

question about sex Dec 6, 2003

I don't know if you could help me or not. When my boyfriend and are are about to have sex, he all of a sudden goes soft. Not all the time but more often times then I think is normal. It will go hard again and sometimes he can finish but other times he can't. Do you think it's just stress or could it be more serious than that?

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hi,

That's a little hard (or soft) to tell over the Internet. Try this: Say, "Judy, Carol, Barbra, Liza, and Bette" in very rapid succession. If he answers back, "Garland, Burnett, Streisand, Minnelli, and Midler" equally quickly, then yes, he may have a problem that's more than stress or performance anxiety. Alternatively, have him see his doctor for an evaluation.

Good luck.

Dr. Bob

question about sex Dec 6, 2003

I don't know if you could help me or not. When my boyfriend and are are about to have sex, he all of a sudden goes soft. Not all the time but more often times then I think is normal. It will go hard again and sometimes he can finish but other times he can't. Do you think it's just stress or could it be more serious than that?

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hi,

That's a little hard (or soft) to tell over the Internet. Try this: Say, "Judy, Carol, Barbra, Liza, and Bette" in very rapid succession. If he answers back, "Garland, Burnett, Streisand, Minnelli, and Midler" equally quickly, then yes, he may have a problem that's more than stress or performance anxiety. Alternatively, have him see his doctor for an evaluation. Good luck.

Dr. Bob

Sex through zipper on pants?

Jan 19, 2004

can a guy have sex with you through the zipper on his pants? without unbuttoning them?

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello,

What the hell are you talking about? First off, zippers zip and buttons button. Zippers don't unbutton. Next, even if the dude is a pencil-dicked geek, his Mr. Happy just wouldn't fit through a zipped zipper. Right? So tell me, just how small is your boyfriend?

Dr. Bob

french kissing risk Jun 24, 2005

In trying to assess the risk of acquiring any STD, I've never seen a question put to you in this way, "Knowing what you do, would you engage in french kissing with a stranger?"

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello,

I'll need a bit more information than that! Is the stranger hot?

Dr. Bob

Is using a thong or g-strings safe? Jul 17, 2005

I just wanna know if using g-string, thongs or t-backs safe? does it not irritated the external genitalia?

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hi,

And umm . . . why would you be asking me? I'm really much more of a briefs or sometimes boxers guy. Are g-strings, thongs and t-backs safe? Hmmm . . . well millions of strippers, desperate housewives, supermodels and closeted homosexual Republican politicians love them. Do they irritate the genitalia? Hmmm . . . I seem to remember an episode of Sex and the City in which Samantha received a pearl thong from one of her lovers. As I recall, while climbing stairs, yes, she found it quite irritating. Are they safe HIV-wise? That all depends on what happens if and when they come off. Stay well. By the way, are you a future supermodel or closeted homosexual Republican politician?

Dr. Bob

body piercings Jul 21, 2005

what are the pros and cons about getting your tongue pierced?

Response from Dr. Frascino

Pros: Some folks find them a turn-on. Cons: OUCH! OUCH! OUCH! OUCH!!!!!!

anemic? Jul 6, 2004

Tired, exhausted, or anemic???Which am I????????? Please help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello,

Ummm, I really don't know. Am I supposed to guess, or perhaps instead of this forum, you were trying to reach the psychic hotline?

Regarding anemia, the diagnosis is really quite simple a simple blood test called hemoglobin will give you the answer. If your hemoglobin level is less than the lower limit of normal, you're anemic. For men, the lower limit is 14 g/dL (12 g/dL for women). So look at your blood test results and then you can tell me if you're anemic or not, OK? I'll take it from there, discussing potential causes for anemia as well as treatment options, like Procrit.

Now regarding tired versus exhausted, I'll once again quote an old Chinese proverb. Confucius say: Man who run behind car get exhausted but man who run in front of car get tired.

Stay well.

Dr. Bob

Does masturbation lead to baldness Aug 26, 2005

Does maturbation lead to baldness?

Response from Dr. Frascino

No, Rogaine-Failure, your chrome dome is not a consequence of burping the nephew!

Dr. Bob

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hey Dexter,

Interesting set of favorite Dr. Bobisms! You have a very twisted sense of humor! I like that in a man! (or woman for that matter.)

Sorry about the tea-soaked electronics.

Regarding credit card donations to The Robert James Frascino AIDS Foundation, yes, our foundation's Web site credit card donation function was down for a week or so, as our Web hosts and designers made a few improvements to our site. Sorry for the inconvenience and thank you for your persistence in trying to make a gift to help others in desperate need. As of today, the credit card donation function is once again operational and ready, willing and able to accept your tax-deductible donations. And Dexter, due to your patience and persistence in trying to make your donation, I promise to send you something in your thank-you acknowledgement letter that I hope will encourage additional smiling -- and perhaps further hot-tea spewing!!! (I'm not sure if it could be considered wise or wise-assed, but I think with your twisted sense of humor you'll appreciate it.)

Be well. Stay well.

Dr. Bob



Previous
THANK YOU...you opended my mind (HIV TRANSMISSION, CASUAL CONTACT)
Next
condom break 1

  
  • Email Email
  • Glossary Glossary

 Get Email Notifications When This Forum Updates or Subscribe With RSS


 
Advertisement



Q&A TERMS OF USE

This forum is designed for educational purposes only, and experts are not rendering medical, mental health, legal or other professional advice or services. If you have or suspect you may have a medical, mental health, legal or other problem that requires advice, consult your own caregiver, attorney or other qualified professional.

Experts appearing on this page are independent and are solely responsible for editing and fact-checking their material. Neither TheBody.com nor any advertiser is the publisher or speaker of posted visitors' questions or the experts' material.

Review our complete terms of use and copyright notice.

Powered by ExpertViewpoint

Advertisement