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And th e Bomb Dropped, My Partner is Positive - Young Gay Couple

Sep 12, 2007

Dr. Bob

I am a 29 year old male and my partner is 25 y/o male. We have been in a committed closed relationship for the past 18 months. We actually began talking about a life together then last week the bomb dropped. He revealed to me 2-3 months ago he found out he was positive. He had not had a screening for about 2 years and finally went for a test a couple months ago.

For the past 18 months our sex life has involved a lot of receptive oral sex (him down on me) and always protected anal sex (mostly me topping him). He doesnt really like oral sex (so he says and never ejaculates in my mouth). I am still negative as of today. Is it rational /reasonable to assume if we are careful, and continue doing what we always have been doing, we should stay negative / positive respectively? Or is continuing this relationship just playing with fire, and flirting with the inevitable and me catching this?

Lastly, we are both so young what is your long term vision of care, treatments, etc in 10-20 years when I assume the HIV will begin to catch up with my 26 year old partner more when he is 45-55 years old.

Lastly, any word on a vaccine for this bane of the planet?


Running out of Ativan Msg Back Soon

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello Running out of Ativan,

Is continuing your magnetic relationship (one poz, one neggie) with your boyfriend "playing with fire???" Well, I don't know. How "hot" is your Studly Dudley?

Are you "flirting with the inevitable" of becoming HIV positive if you stay with Mr. Virally Enhanced??? No, and I do speak from experience. I, too, am part of a magnetic couple. Steve (Dr. Steve, the expert in The Body's Tratamientos forum) is my life partner. Aside from being "heaven on a stick," he's also HIV negative. I, like your partner, cohabit with HIV. Steve and I have been together for nearly 14 years and I do mean "together," as in toe-curling, neighbor-waking, own-name-forgetting sex.

I would suggest both you and your Mr. Wonderful read through the sections of the archives of this forum that pertain to magnetic couples and also HIV transmission. By taking the appropriate precautions, I see no reason why HIV should ruin your (and your boyfriend's) chances for your own Happily Ever After. Also, it's worth noting that if a significant HIV exposure occurs (broken condom, etc.), PEP (post-exposure prophylaxis) should be readily available and started as soon as possible after the exposure. You can read more about this in the archives.

As for long-term prognosis, well no one has an infallible crystal ball except Professor Trelawney at Hogwarts and personally I'm having considerable difficulty remembering the future, so I can't give you any guarantees. However, considering the progress we've made with HIV treatment over the past several decades and the promises of the new therapies currently in development, I see no reason why your poz partner shouldn't plan on dying of old age rather than AIDS. That's certainly my plan.

Good luck to you both. I'm here if you need me, OK?

Dr. Bob

HIV+ Resistant
Wrong information!!! Arggh

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