Asking somebody their HIV status
Jul 25, 2007
I met a guy, totally unexpected in a movie theatre while waiting to enter the movie house, who is married, has 2 kids and has fallen in love with me. The problem is. Four years ago he had his first man on man experience where he fucked a brazilian guy, and until now he has only been faithful to his wife. I want to know, how can I ask him to take a HIV test to confirm his status before we have sex together without offending him? As previously mentioned on other government websites is that HIV positive people will not tell you their real status because of fear of rejection.
He has told me that he is clean, and I believe him somewhat, because he has sex on a regular basis with his beautiful down to earth wife, so surely if his having unprotected sex with his wife, I can assume his clean? He cannot hold an erection when wearing a condom. Now I would like to have sex with him without a condom if he is HIV negative. Is this safe? help.
Response from Dr. Frascino
A married dude with two kids fell in love with you while waiting in line at a movie theater? Hmmm . . . must have been a long line or maybe were you in line for the new Harry Potter film and perhaps someone slipped him some amortentia (love potion)? OK, never mind.
I'm a bit confused by your description of your possible future lover boy. ". . . until now he has only been faithful to his wife" and ". . . four years ago he fucked a Brazilian guy." Hmmm . . . he doesn't exactly sound all that faithful (not to mention the sexual orientation issues).
Moving on to your concerns, should you have unprotected sex with this guy? Of course not! What are you, out of your gourd??? Even if he slaps a lie detector on his Mr. Happy, I wouldn't trust this guy!
And what's this nonsense about his inability to hold an erection when wearing a condom? The rule is no glove, no love! Have him see his doctor if he's having problems with the dreaded "ED" (erectile dysfunction).
Finally, how can you ask him to take an HIV test? Easy, open your mouth and ask! You can even go together to a rapid test site and have results within 20 minutes. However, even with a negative HIV test, I would still advise always using a latex condom to prevent STDs.
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