Mar 24, 2007
Hi Doc, It's me your crazed obssessed friend.HAHAHA!! This is more of a comment then a question. I only had one oraquick test after 10yrs post exposure and it came back neg. WAY... beyond window period right? Well even though I gpt a neg test it has been almost 8 more months and occasionally I still find myself obssessing about hiv especially when I or my kids get sick. My point is I was very promiscuois in my younger years and married into a very conservative christian family.So if anyone of my kids or husband had hiv it most definatley would have been my fault. I was disscussing this w/my sis and she said you are so full of guilt it's crazy!!! And it hit me I am, not only because of my past but because i could have unknowinly and irresponsibly infectedthe people I love. BUT! I think it runs even deeper then that, I think it's almost like survivours guilt because the way I was in my teen years was like playing a form of hiv roulette.And you think, I was so not careful how could "I" p ossibly not be infected.And I think alot of people that write feel the same way too.But instead of obsessing about a disease I do not have I should be whoohooing and figuring out a way to pay it forward. This also helped me to relize that maybe only teaching my kids that abstinence is the only way is really a bad idea. I mean let's face it I grew up in all christian schools and I was a BBBBAAAADDD girl!! And most kids are bound to have sexual experiences before they are "married". I guess I really just want to thank you because as I write this tears are coming down. You have inspired me to change my way of thinking and to educate my children so that they don't make the same stupid mistakes I did and don't end up on your website in ten years writing DR.DOC BOB.....! You are a blessing to so many and a gift. Thanks for all you humor and to the point answers you are loved in our home!!! Love h.
Response from Dr. Frascino
Yes indeed, 10 years is WAY, WAY, WAY beyond the window period!
Guilt is indeed a major contributing factor to irrational HIV anxiety. I absolutely agree with you!
As for your realization that "instead of obsessing about a disease (you) do not have, (you) should be WOO-HOOing and figuring out a way to pay it forward," again, I couldn't agree more!
Next, teaching kids "abstinence only" is indeed "a really bad idea!" Absofrickinlutely!
Personally, I don't believe having sex before marriage makes someone a BBBBAAADDD" person, no matter what the whacko Christian Right preaches. After all, they don't even want to allow me to marry. ("Same sex marriage is a sin.") And they don't "believe" in sex before marriage. So I guess that means I would never ever have sex by their twisted hateful logic. The radical Christian Right is just so morally wrong! Jesus won't be happy when they finally meet him!
I'm delighted you have decided to teach your children the truth. Hopefully your experience and your comments will encourage other parents to do the same! Experiences like yours and HIV itself are preventable! And not by promoting idiotic "virginity pledges" and avoiding the discussion of condoms, but rather by accepting human nature and teaching scientific truths.
Be well. Stay well.
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