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Concerned about exposure
Feb 11, 2007

Dr Frascino, I am 30 year old gay male living in south Florida. A few days ago, ( Super Bowl time actually, when the area was full of HOT men ) I went to a bar and met a guy and we came back to my place and hooked up. I stupidly had ran out of lube, although I had pre-lubricated ( not with spermicide, I know that's not good ) Black Tuxedo condoms ( they rock ). He used a little bit of spit I think, and the pre-lube on the condom was actually pretty good. Anyways, even though he was very well endowed for the most part it wasn't painful. He came still inside of me but in the condom, as far as I can tell it wasn't broken, when he took it off it SEEMED intact. However, after all was said and done ( this is where it gets graphic -- I apologize to you and anyone else who might read this ) I used the bathroom and noted some " wet spots " of blood along with some stool, which even though I am not frequently a bottom, I know its not rare. HERE IS MY CONCERN: I don't usually bottom and he was big ( I gotta move to Indiana apparently! ), up until last week the last time had been 8 months ago. I was also a little tense, and all we had for lube was spit and the pre-lubed condom, so I am not surprised I bled a little. My concern, is that these were WET spots of blood ( I know, blood is wet and this is a toilet, but it seemed different ). Could that have come from the spit and the lube on the condom, or did the condom PERHAPS have a tear and it was semen that caused it to be " wet "? I didn't see semen per se, but could it have gotten mixed up with the blood? Since I bled, I am concerned that somehow there was a small tear in the condom somewhere and with not using enough lube I bled and now his semen got into my body, that is my concern. He threw the condom away, I saw him take it off and it seemed fine, but would I have been able to tell if it tore during sex when we were having sex, even if it tore just a little? BOTTOM LINE QUESTION IS: Is what I experienced normal and I just need to take some Xanax and learn to relax ( as my friends tell me, since I don't usually bottom ), or I am up the creek without a paddle? I am confused and a little concerned, any help would be appreciated. I'd say I would donate but I've been donating to concertedeffort.org for a while now :) EVERYBODY PLEASE DONATE Thanks!! " Jorge " - Miami

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hi "Jorge,"

Unfortunately I can't tell you exactly what or where your "wet" spots originated. However, I can tell you that when a condom breaks, it usually is not a subtle occurrence. When a "Black Tuxedo" thin piece of latex stretched over the massive crotch rocket of an Indiana farm boy tears, it does so quite dramatically. If your Studly-Dudley did indeed remain "dressed for the occasion" (in his black tux), then your HIV risk is negligible. An HIV test at the three-month mark will give you a definitive result and put any residual fears permanently to rest, OK?

Thanks for your tax-deductible donations, Jorge. In return, I'm sending my best good-luck/good-health karma that your HIV tests remain negative.

Be well. Stay well. Stock up on water-based lube before the next big occasion (Valentine's Day?) comes (cums?) around.

Dr. Bob



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