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Telling mom???

Jan 6, 2007

I was diagnosed as HIV+, September 1995. My T cell is 569 and viral load 100,000 as of today. I am not on medications at this time. My question is about telling my mother. I have told my best friend, my sponsor (In SAA, of which I have one year and half sobriety), another couple of friends. I now feel it is time to tell my mom. Do you think it would be okay to request that my mom go to the doctor with me (an HIV specialist) and let me tell her in front of him, so that she can ask questions and not be so afraid? Sorry for the long introduction. Thanks for helping so many people. kirk

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hi Kirk,

I think that is an excellent idea. However, call your HIV specialist first and advise him this is the purpose of the visit. I have had many similar visits with HIV-positive patients and their moms, dads, husbands, wives, lovers, children, etc. to help disclose the difficult news. The HIV specialist can help answer any questions, dispel myths, offer informational brochures and provide information about support groups and other resources that the family members may find helpful.

Fear and misinformation are the two biggest obstacles to overcome. Of course, once your Mom realizes you've been positive since 1995, she should calm down a bit and realize you're not going to evaporate in front of her eyes. It will be a bit difficult at first, but I have no doubt that it is a wise decision to be open about your diagnosis with Mom. Once the shock wears off, be prepared for the "why didn't you tell me sooner" questions!

Good luck.

Dr. Bob

U drive a hard bargain
Can stopping meds cause a relapse if it is undetectable

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