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Yet another asshole to bother you.

Dec 10, 2006

hey dr bob i need to ask you something about masterbation 1.i have been jerkin my dick off everyday now is that bad. the ads on the internet say the truth about meds makeing you pepe bigger. there any kind of masterbation that makes you penis larger

4. how much times do you think i should masterbare per week. you masterbate alot dr bob if so i am ganna probbley guss how large your penis size is u look like u have a 11 or 10 incher

stay well dr bob


Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello Horned-Up Awan Afuqya,

1. Masturbation is not bad; it's completely normal.

2. See posts from archives below.

3. If there was, my dick would need its own zip code.

4. As many times as you want.

5. Yes, I do. As for size, well, let it suffice to say I am a full-blooded Italian.

Stay well, Sticky Fingers.

Dr. Bob

does masterbation cause acne Aug 21, 2006

my friends recently told me that if i masterbate it will cause an increase in acne is that true

Response from Dr. Frascino


Your friends told you what??? Hmmm . . . . Are your friends pimply pusses themselves? I would guess either (1) your friends are pulling your leg, trying to make you feel guilty about pulling something else or (2) your friends come from very religious (read: sexually frustrated) families and are enrolled in a Bush-sponsored abstinence-only sex education course. Either way, your friends are shooting you a load of misinformation about shooting a load. I'll repost some questions about masturbation from the archives that address the acne connection as well as other myths about choking the trouser snake. You can use the information to educate your pals so they can stop stock piling Clearasil Ultra just in case!

Dr. Bob


Sep 22, 2005

What is the truth about side-effects of Masturbation. I heard people saying that it might stunt your growth, etc.

Response from Dr. Frascino


Masturbation stunting growth??? Gosh, if that were true, I'd be two feet tall and working as part of the Lollypop Guild, welcoming folks to Munchkinland.

The only side effects of masturbation are feeling great and having sticky fingers. It will not turn you gay. You won't run out of semen. You won't get hairy palms. It won't make your eyesight go bad. It does not cause acne. It won't cause your penis to shrink. Masturbation is normal and it's healthy!

Stay well, Jack-a-roo! Dr. Bob

side-effects of masturbation

Feb 4, 2005

Does vigorous masturbation will result in HIVs or some STDs. Also what are the side-effects of masturbation.

Response from Dr. Frascino


No, despite what Sister Missionary Position might have taught you in Sunday school, masturbation does not result in HIV or STDs. What are the "side effects of masturbation?" well, let's see . . . ah . . . sticky fingers, feeling ecstatic, grunting or maybe screaming Oh My Goddddddd! and finally getting yelled at by your mom for being in the bathroom too long with the door locked.

Dr. Bob


Aug 12, 2006

I am really involved in masterbation for the past 5 years.Can this enable me to get children in future?(infertility). Is there any effects related to this?

Response from Dr. Frascino


". . . really involved in masturbation for the past 5 years . . ."??? WOW! You've got stamina! "Can this enable me to get children in the future?" Well, no. technically speaking you'll need to have sex with someone other than "Mrs. Palm and her 5 daughters" in order to produce offspring. Are there "any effects related to masturbation?" Hmmm . . . well yes, but you've probably experienced all these already. For instance:

1. Rapid shallow breathing, which increases in tempo as you reach the point of no return.

2. Involuntarily yelling "oh god, oh god, oh god, OHHHHH GODDDD . . . AUGHHHH!

3. Sticky fingers.

To seriously answer your questions:

1. Masturbation does not affect one's ability to conceive children. (No link to fertility or infertility.)

2. There are no detrimental effects from burping the nephew, except perhaps being yelled at by Mom for locking yourself in the bathroom for protracted periods of time.

Your questions do point out once again the astounding failure of our current sex education efforts!

Relax, guy. Enjoy your home entertainment center.

Dr. Bob


Jun 13, 2006 a male, and i have been masturbating everyday, twice a day for almost 4 years there a chance that i have hiv/aids?

Response from Dr. Frascino


No, for two reasons:

1. You can't give yourself something you don't already have (i.e. a million dollars or HIV, for instance).

2. When would you have time to contract a sexually transmitted illness when you spend so much time by yourself burping the nephew?

I'd suggest you put mini-me away for a while and spend some time reviewing the wealth of information on this site and related links that pertains to how HIV is and is not transmitted. But go wash your hands first, OK?

Dr. Bob

penis enlargement May 9, 2006

there are so many penis enlargement pills out there do any of them actually work?

Response from Dr. Frascino


Come on Dude, think it through. If any of these products worked, every guy would have a Mr. Happy so large it would require it's own zip codes rather than so many dudes having those tragic "head in the bushes" tiny weenies commonly found on Republican politicians.

Dr. Bob

penis enlargement Jul 23, 2006

are there any products that will actually increa se girth and length of the male penis?

Response from Dr. Frascino


Sure. Lots. For instance DVDs with titles like:

1. Shaving Ryan's Privates

2. For Your Thighs Only

3. Three Men and a Barbie

4. On Golden Blond

5. Sleepy Booty

6. You Got Male

7. The Joy Suck Club

8. I Know Who You Did Last Summer

9. Robin's Wood

10. Star Whores

11. Robocock

12. ET the Extra Testicle

13. Glad-He-Ate-Her

14. A Rear and Pleasant Danger

15. My Bare Lady

16. Sorest Rump

17. Saturday Night Beaver

18. Laurence of A Labia

19. Clity Clity Gang Bang

But I should warn you the "increase in girth and length" is only temporary.

Dr. Bob

Sawubona Mar 6, 2004

Dear Ebrahim, that is Bob in Arabic. Just wanted to to say Sawubona in Zulu to a great man. Thank you for all the advice and also the humour. (Now seriously about the penis enlargement advice - is it necesssary? Love you Ebrahim. The Zulu Warrior.

Response from Dr. Frascino


Well the last several Zulu warriors that I happened to see in the showers at the gym earlier today certainly did not need the penis enlargement procedure. Then again, maybe they already had had it done!?!

Dr. Ebrahim

Long time worrier (think 2003), first time poster

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