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Thought I did everything right!

May 22, 2006

Dr. Bob, I have read your answers off and on the past 3 years and appreciate your humour and good naturedness. 3 years ago I had unprotected insertive oral sex from a massage parlor lady (for less than 30 seconds). I stopped before anything happened and subsequently told the story to the closest clinic. I was tested for HIV at 3 mths and 6 mths and both were negative. I assumed this was closed and done. My wife and I began having unprotected sex again as she went on the pill after our 2nd child, soon after my 6mth test. Over the last 3 years, she has had some gynecological issues, such as so severe menstrual pain that she was in the hospital and checked for ovarian cysts not too long agoe. And, just recently has been diagnosed w/ oral thrush. She just had a test today for many things, including HIV. I just don't know what to think right now. I assumed my tests were accurate, but non-immuno compormised people just aren't supposed to get thrush, are they? Just would like to see your thought Dr. Bob, b/c I really respect your work and your opinion. PS, I just got tested again yesterday for the sake of it, but I fear her test results will be rec'd before mine. Thanks very much!

Response from Dr. Frascino


I agree you did everything right regarding HIV testing. Repeatedly testing negative out to six months is definitive and conclusive. HIV is not your problem. I doubt it's your wife's problem either. But if she were to be HIV positive, she didn't get it from you!

Thrush is a common illness. The vast majority of cases have absolutely nothing to do with HIV.

Finally, regarding doing everything right, did you level with your wife about your massage-parlor lady? If not, you should, as guilt can lead to anxiety and depression. I can't diagnose your wife's problem over the Internet, but I can definitively say she did not contract HIV as a consequence of your 30 seconds of oral sex three years ago!

Dr. Bob

He is negative, I am positive. Already donated
Am I the exception

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