Re: Are my kids at risk?
May 8, 2006
I just want to say first, you're incredible, second ur right on with this guy. I'm poz and my father jumped up and down on me pretty hard when I told him. I haven't told the rest of my family and have hardly spoken to him since. I don't live at home so prob not quite the same, and I have a great support network anyway, but I wanted to warn "worried dad." As someone in your son's situation (tho older and straight - tho frankly that's irrelevant), if u push your son away now, you will lose him, possibly forever. How do you think your wife and other kids will feel about that?
Take care of yourself Dr Bob - people like this obviously need you!
Response from Dr. Frascino
Thanks for your comments.
Sometimes it seems to me certain people should never have become parents.
I'm pleased to hear you have a great support network. None of us should have to face this challenge alone.
I'll reprint the "worried dad" post below in hopes that it reaches others as well.
Stay well. Let's get through this together, OK? And when it comes time to choose your dad's nursing home, perhaps you'll remember his kind compassionate response to your illness.
Are my kids at risk? May 2, 2006
My son has AIDS. I don't know for how long, he is 19 years old and I found out when I found his medications in his room. I was checking for drugs because hes been acting strange, but sure as anything didnt expect this. I have three younger kids, the youngest is only 9. Should I ask him to move out? Hes gay (I have nothing against this) but hes also a bad influence on his brother and sisters. Now hes AIDS is he dangerous to them? Or me and his mother?
Thank you for any advice.
Response from Dr. Frascino
Hello Worried Father,
You just found out your 19-year-old son has AIDS and your first inclination is to throw him out of the house???? WOW. Apparently your moniker, "Worried Father," applies to being worried about everyone (including yourself), but not your son!!! Shame on you, sir.
Is your gay HIV-positive son a danger to you, your wife or your other children? No. HIV is not transmitted by casual contact. No way. No how.
Perhaps the reason your son has been acting strangely is because he has HIV/AIDS and has tragically felt the need to hide this information from you and the rest of his family. Of course, now that I see what your initial reaction is, I understand his desire to keep his diagnosis secret.
I suggest you, your wife and your son sit down and discuss the situation rationally. Family counseling may be very beneficial. Go with your son to his HIV/AIDS specialist physician visits and talk with his doctor. Get involved with your son's life and help support him through this crisis. Turning your back on him now and throwing him out of the house would be both cruel and immoral.
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