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Am I infected?

Apr 9, 2006

Dear Dr. Bob,

First I want to thank you and this website. It really cheered me up from my fears. I just want to hear from your expert opinion on my personal experience. That would help a lot for me! First of all, I want explain to you the experience I had that made me very worried. I have never been tested before, most sexual relationship I had is either my girlfriend or friend that I know personally. There was no one-night stand or anything like that before. When I have sex, I usually dont put condom at the first for a little while during sex, and afterwards I put the condom on and finish off with it. (Mostly didnt put on for like 1 to 2 min) I never hear any of my sex partners to be HIV positive (maybe they dont know). I did have 4 long-term girlfriends, which we had sex during their period, also none of them had HIV supposedly. Most of the girls Ive been with are from age 18 to 25. I never use drugs and not much of a drinker. No STD history as well and I have never felt similar HIV symptoms, only had fever sometimes during winter and rarely in summers times. Recently I got with my new girlfriend and had unprotected sex 4 months ago when we met. She only had 2 sex partners total; her first BF and me. She just took the HIV test and we are still waiting for the result. I took it 3 days after she did. My questions are 1.) Is it possible for me to be affected with HIV for my past experiences, and am I at high-risk group? 2) If my girlfriend got the result that is negative in her test, is my test will be mostly likely negative as well? Or maybe I will be big chance still getting positive? I am very worried about this, wouldnt want to infect my new girlfriend and got myself infected from past experience. I will make a donation to your organization and please tell me how=)

Thank you so much Dr. Bob


Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello Ray,

The basic concepts are quite straightforward:

A. Unprotected sex places you at some degree of risk for STDs, including HIV.

B. HIV testing three months after the last potential exposure would give you a definitive result.

C. Proper condom use includes putting the condom on before you have sex and not a minute or two after you've started the ol' in-and-out!

To specifically address your questions:

1. You are not in a high-risk group, but since you've had unprotected sex, you are at some degree of risk.

2. Your girlfriend's test result is her result. You can't base your results on hers.

My advice is simple:

1. Learn proper condom-use technique. (This site and related links are good resources for that.) Use condoms start-to-finish for all your sexual encounters.

2. Get HIV tested three months after your last possible exposure, including any times the condom was not used properly.

Thanks for your willingness to make a donation to The Robert James Frascino AIDS Foundation. Donation information is available on the Foundation's Web site at

Stay safe. Stay well.

Dr. Bob

Am I Just Kidding Myself?

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