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Symptoms & Suicidal
Dec 27, 2005

Dr. Thanks for the great forum. You are an amazing person.

This is my third time writing. I hope you will reply as I am almost ready to commit suicide and I mean it. It is not a threat letter to reply but a sincere request.

About a month ago I went to the massage parlor and she massaged her vagina with the fingers and after used the same hand to masturbate my unprotected penis. She added some lotion after which I ejaculated. Sex workers come in contact with so many people on a daily basis and it would be hard to know what her status is. I did talk to her atfer the episode and she claims to be negative. But I doubt that as I have all the symptoms and she being a sex worker.

Unfortunaltly, I also cheated on my wife and reading several comments on your forum I came clean with my wife and told her the whole episode. She is very supportive and maintains that it is very hard to get HIV.

However, my issue is I have all the symptoms - fever, night sweats that wake me up, fatigue, loss of apetite, swollen throat, white marks on the throat, depression.

The night sweats wake me up and as soon as I close my eyes they come back and don't let me sleep.

I don't know if I can wait three months for the test or even if I have the courage to take the test. I don't see a purpose. I feel I should just kill myself.

Doctor I don't have any hope and don't have the strength to fight the virus and am constantly thinking of ways to kill myself. Please help me.

You can reply to my email or post it on the forum.

I really appreciate you for taking the time to read. You are doing great work and I have been amazed by your career path. You are God sent for all of us in need. I put in a donation.

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello,

"I hope you will reply as I am almost ready to commit suicide and I mean it." You do realize that I am HIV positive, don't you? Don't you find it somewhat insensitive to write such comments to me, merely because you're having some anxiety dealing with the fact you had a low-risk potential exposure with a hooker? Get a grip. Your post also did not contain a question, so I'll just summarize what should already be obvious.

1. Your HIV risk was minimal to nonexistent leaning heavily toward the nonexistent side, I might add!

2. Get HIV tested at three months to confirm what we all suspect you are HIV negative.

3. Get psychiatric help to cope with your anxiety and irrational fears. Considering that you've had some suicidal ideation, I suggest you get this help ASAP. You do have a problem, it's just not HIV!

4. Once this HIV scare is behind you and we've confirmed your HIV-negative status (and yes, I'm sure that will indeed happen), spend some time working on your egocentric character and behavior. Should you choose to write back, I'd suggest you delete the suicide threats and include a question, and perhaps even an apology. OK?

Dr. Bob



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