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I need a woo hoo from the good doc
Sep 24, 2005

Hey ho Dr. B.

Had insertive oral with a one nighter unprotected. The rest was protected, but who'd a thunk there was some risk althoug very slight with that scenario. OK, you got me, she was a hooker of the skanky variety, so the risk was a bit higher. That was 96 days ago. I did have a minor sore on the side of Mr. happy, but I really think it had scabbed over. I had an oral swab HIV test at the local county clinic anonymously yesterday and it came back negative. I read and read and read about the woo hoos, but decided I needed my own to join the X files club.

One other thing which Blew me away (which is partially why I need the woo hoo from you). The nurse at the clinic was intent as hell on a good lecture, even with a student nurse in with her. Made me feel pretty stupid and even dirty. Then she says, a 90 day test is good to do, but they are only 90-95% accurate and 6 months is about as close as you get, but still not 100%.

Everything I read here says 90 days is conclusive, final, be happy, stay healthy, be safe, but this clinic giving me that line is a little unsettling. I had gotten anxious waiting and had a test earlier than I should have and got a 90 day 95 from nurse. How uninformed are they there? How in this day and age would they give out bad info?

Beyond that, the most disgusting part? From one visit to the other, the clinic actually put up posters on abstinence being the best medicine. The posters discussed how to stay abstinent (thanks dubya you freaking idiot). So sad...forget the human experience, forget supporting those in need. I would have rather seen a free condom dispenser. If they looked at who is in the waiting room for the tests, they would see their brother, sister, mother, dad, grandpa, grandma, aunt, cousin, neighbor, priest, governor, president, boss. That is who I saw there while I sat and waited.

If any of the folks working at these clinics get a chance to read this, please, please, please, have compassion and care about those you are testing and don't lecture. Educate!!! Counsel!!! Help!!! If you are tired of the process, find another job. We get the point and don't need a holier than thou discussion.

Doc Bob, thanks for the forum, your compassion, your willingness to educate, your willingess to counsel, all of the time you take away from your life to help all of us. Oh, and for making a straight father of three think, (briefly), about what it would be like to get squishy between you and Doc Steve. Oh, and for hopefully a woo hoo to help me move on. I need to feel safe to get wiggy with the Mrs. She has been great through this odeal and deserves some sweet lovin'. .

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello Straight Father of Three Thinking of Getting Squishy,

I would consider a 95-day negative HIV test following a one-nighter of unprotected insertive oral with Skanky Hooker to be definitive, conclusive and WOO-HOO-able.

I agree free condoms are more effective than abstinence posters.

All things considered, I suggest you get wiggy rather than squishy.

Stay well.

Dr. Bob



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