|Came clean with wife, Dr. Bob I need your help
Aug 16, 2005
Dr. Bob, First let me say that I have been in your forum a lot over the last 2 weeks and I find you to be truly amazing. I had a sexual encounter with 2 other men same occasion, oral sex. I have not had sex with anyone but my wife before that in 13 years. I found "the body" after I began to freak out, realizing I have had some bumps in my throat for quite some time before this encounter. I know that though oral sex has low risk, the risk is higher with mouth issues. I did not sleep for days, lost 15 pounds from not eating and have had swelling in my throat (I hope from anxiety and lack of sleep). I read all the anxious "oral sex" questions trying to make myself feel better. I was dying inside. On your advice to other people I came clean with my wife and told her of my concerns about possible HIV exposure even though the 2 mens status is unknown to me. She has blown me away with her understanding and support, even though I possibly put her at risk also.
I did not mean to get long winded, I just thought this might help someone else in my same situation.
Now to my question and my need for your advice. I just got an HIV test from my regular doctor at 10 days. Obviously I am anxious to wooo--hooo and can afford to do a pcr dna, do you think this is a good choice?
I made a donation to your foundation as I have a new deep respect for you and your cause and hope to soon have a new lease on life... Thank you in advance..
| Response from Dr. Frascino
So first you get blown by two guys simultaneously and then you get "blown away" by your wife???? Hmmm . . . . Wow, Dude, you have been having quite a lucky week.
O.K., on to your question. Oral sex, as you probably have learned if you've "been on this forum a lot over the last two weeks," carries a very low risk for HIV transmission. I generally do not recommend PCR testing for routine HIV screening due to the possibility of false-positive tests. Although I do find PCR DNA testing sometimes helpful in diagnosing acute HIV disease in the period prior to the development of detectable anti-HIV antibodies. For your minimal to negligible risk, I would recommend only a single HIV ELISA test at the three-month mark.
I think your wife is a classy lady. I wish you both health and much happiness. The best relationships are built on honesty and facing challenges together.
I'll send you both my best good-luck karma that your definitive test remains negative.
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