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Magnetic gay relationship
Aug 15, 2004

First, thank you for all that you do to educate others! Second, I've been with a POZ man for three months. I'm looking to the future and I'm hearing wedding bells! I need quality information regarding intimacy between us and all of the dos/don'ts. Anything you can do is greatly appreciated! PlaySafeStaySafe

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello,

All the do's and don't's?!? That would certainly be a very lengthy and rather graphic response. I'd suggest you read through the archives of this forum pertaining to serodiscordant (magnetic) couples. I'll also give a few guidelines, and then if you have specific questions after that, you can write back, OK?

Basically you need to have a "positive" view of safer sex (so to speak). This includes realizing that one of the great things about being alive is having sex and also that sex is as important to seropositives (like me) as it is to seronegatives (like my lover Dr. Steve in The Body's Tratamientos Forum).

My advice for magnetic couples is:

1. Communication is key.

2. HIV-positives feel better when HIV negatives share the worry of possible infection.

3. Accept each other as different.

4. Get graphic about sexual experiences and fantasies.

5. Discuss what each feels is unsafe based on individual comfort level and medical facts.

6. Create a safer-sex ritual you both agree to and stick to it. 7. If there is an "accident" and a significant exposure occurs, consider PEP (post-exposure prophylaxis), realizing that the sooner this is started, the better is the chance of it working.

If your magnetic relationship works out to be anything at all like ours, be prepared for happiness beyond your wildest dreams!

Good luck.

Dr. Bob



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