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Dr. Bob! Is this woman right, ignorant, or just plain mean!

Aug 8, 2004

Hi Doctor Bob!

I am happy to see you are well and fighting HIV as usual in your comedic way!

Here's a question for you. I have been sleeping with a woman who has decided to sever our relationship due to my vigilance about having safe sex. From time to time when we have sex, i check the condom to make sure it isn't broken. She says it makes her feel uncomfortable that I am so obsessed with staying safe. Also i received head from her, but refused to give it, as i am trying to follow the guidelines. It seems every girl i meet and fool around with doesn't seem interested in strictly adhering to the safer sex guidelines! Is it me thats the looney here Bob? or are these girls out to lunch?

What the heck can I do? I am starting to wonder if there is anyone out there who actually cares about safer sex!...

Thanks Bob. Vic.

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hi Vic,

First off, I'm delighted you are diligent about strictly adhering to the safer sex guidelines! If everyone did, the rates of new infections would plummet. I believe every person should understand the potential HIV risk posed by their actions and decide for themselves what level of risk they are willing to accept. For you, for instance, getting head is OK, but giving it is not. That's a personal decision. Others may decide differently.

As for "checking the condom to make sure it isn't broken," I think everyone should do this. However, it's a question of how you check. It's very easy: just take a look at your one-eyed monster when you pull out. If your Cyclops is staring back at you without a rain bonnet on, the condom failed. It's really not a subtle thing. When stretched latex breaks, it tears very dramatically. If, on the other hand, you are taking your spunk-filled condoms to the kitchen sink and filling them with gallons of water looking for leaks, well that may be a bit excessive.

As for your comment, "It seems every girl I meet and fool around with doesn't seem interested in strictly adhering to the safer sex guidelines . . .," well Vic, it may be time to try meeting chicks someplace other than

Stay safe, Vic. I'm confident you'll soon find either Ms. Right or Ms. Right-now.

Dr. Bob

Guess what? 12 week neg. ELISA is false!! Please read.
Took a break, now what?

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