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Claiming rape to force a person to get tested...

Jul 26, 2004

Why is it that you never answer me? I want to know what to do about finding out a partners status. I am thinking about telling the police he raped me so that he has to get a test. I know this is mean, but he had sex with me while I was passed out and I dont want to wait 6 months. Is that awful or what?

Response from Dr. Frascino


Yep, that would definitely qualify as awful. Rape is a criminal charge and a conviction could land someone behind bars as well as ruin their life. I also don't condone having sex with someone who's completely passed out! That's way too "Six Feet Under" for me.

From the tone of your question, it does not sound like this was really a case of rape; consequently, I'd suggest just talking rationally to this guy. If he had sex with you, chances are he'd be willing to have an HIV test for you as well. Threatening him would not be advisable or productive. Finally, why wait six months, when three months should be adequate for a definitive HIV test?

I'm sure your conscience will guide you away from a Machiavellian solution to your problem, e.g. "the ends justify the means." Instead, just remember what your mom probably taught you: "Two wrongs don't make one right."

Good luck.

Dr. Bob

A Quick Slip in a Quick Slip Out...What to do?
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