May 28, 2004
Dear Sir I have read some of the answers in this website and basically you say that hiv can not pass by erotic massage and handjob/happy ending. I tried to make myself calm and relax by reading them. But I cant. I have read them more than hundred times and I always feel my situation is different and could be a way to be infected by hiv. In my trip to Malaysia, a prostitute massaged my body ended up with handjob/happy without condom. We were both naked. I thought simple massage is safe and now I am in a panic and always asking myself that the HIV may infected me this way. However, we did not do any type of intercourse. Even I did not touch her body. She just touched me by her hand with baby oil. This part make me so scared. We were sitting in front of each other. Our genitals had about 20 cm distance to each other (not genital contact). Since we were so closed to each other, I always think hiv may jump from her genital to mine making me infected or she fingered herself before giving me handjob. I am so scared that every night I dream that I am infected. I can not sleep at all. Whenever I think about the symptoms I go down to the death. I had sore throat, swollen lymph glands on my neck, chili and night sweats three or four weeks after this event. Please let me know that what is my situation and what should I do? I am married with three children. Best regards.
Response from Dr. Frascino
Hello Married with Children,
You think your situation is different, because HIV may "jump" from her love canal to your one-eyed monster? As Cher said when she bitch-slapped Nicholas Cage in Moonstruck, "Snap out of it!" HIV is a virus, not a frickin' kangaroo!!! No, HIV does not jump, skip, hop, samba, or cha-cha-cha. HIV is not your problem. Guilt is! If you haven't confessed this whole affair to your wife, I'd suggest you do so. If you have done that and continue to have irrational fears and overwhelming guilt/anxiety, you need to seek professional help. Counseling is probably the best way to assure you that what you've "read more than 100 times" is indeed true, and that your case is not "different."
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