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HIV Positive Partner

Apr 9, 2004

Hi Doctor, I'm a man and I'm in a relationship with an HIV positive man. I'm NEGATIVE. Our problem is we love each other but live with the constant battle of worrying if we can live this way. Can this work or will I eventually get infected?


Response from Dr. Frascino


You are part of a "magnetic couple" (one poz and the other negative). So am I. My first suggestion would be to read the archives of this forum. You'll see your concerns are not unique or unanticipated. I do have some key points for you to consider:

1. One of the great things about being alive is having sex. There is no reasonable substitute that is anywhere near as pleasurable and at least for most of us (John Ashcroft excluded, of course), sex is not a luxury that we can easily do without.

2. Communication is key.

3. Discuss with your partner what each of you feels is unsafe, based on medical facts and on individual comfort level.

4. Create a safer-sex ritual you both agree on.

5. Accept each other as different.

6. HIV +'s feel better when their HIV- partners share the worry of possible infection.

7. If there is an "accident" and significant exposure occurs, consider PEP (Post-Exposure Prophylaxis).

8. Many magnetic couples have very successful and satisfying sexual relationships. Steve (Dr. Steve on The Body's Tratamientos Forum) and I will personally testify to that!!

Basically, magnetic couples should have a "positive" view of safer sex!

Good luck. Don't let your "Mr. Right" be "the one that got away" for all the wrong reasons.

Dr. Bob

lsughed out of the clinic. Very hurt
Your Humour is the antidote to our fear

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