Dear Dr. Bob,

I am a chemical engineer active in China. Two weeks ago, I had fully protected oral sex with a callgirl and I know under your Woo-Hoo rules, it is perfectly riskless. Unfortunately, the girl was trying to use the "mouth method" to put the condom on for me. While placing the condom onto her lips, she realised she had placed the condom the wrong way on her lips. (I should have asked her to change a new one but my larger head i.e. brain was not thinking!) She gave up, took the condom from her lips and put it on Mr. Lightsaber with her fingers. My greatest fear now is this - what if her slivia has touched the innerside of the condom and 3 seconds later, touched my penis? Not to mention that I ejaculated into the potentially 'soiled' condom!

Two weeks later, I noticed a slight small rash on my neck and upper chest (comes and go within an hour), my right upper groin (nearer to the stomache) aches -no enlarged lymph nodes but is this the beginning of lymph nodes enlargement??? Are the discomfort due to the production of T-cells fighting a losing battle?- (although that could be caused by excessive running and steep stairsclimber-machine), a two day mild diarrhea (probably caused by eating raw food), no fever, no tiredness and that's it. (This sounds silly - I know the causes and yet I am worried.)

A simple answer, please Dr Bob. Can I woo-hoo? Do I need another test?

By the way, if I survive this, I would like to replicate your help site in Asia. Your sense of humour is keeping many here from killing themselves and I can't thank you enough. To avoid wasting bandwith, I have checked 70 of the oral sex postings to see if someone has the same problem. I sort of recalled a similar case but could not find it. Please help and thank you!

Hi,

Gosh, do hookers really think that "no-hands" condom application trick really impresses anyone these days? If she (or he) could open a ketchup bottle just using her tongue, OK, maybe I'd be impressed, but just unrolling some latex on a lit-up light saber? Nah.

As to an HIV risk from her saliva and tonguing your raincoat, relax, this carries essentially no risk for HIV transmission. HIV testing is not warranted. You and Mr. Lightsaber are both fine and dandy.

Tell the hapless call girl she can't come back until she's mastered the ketchup bottle trick.

WOO-HOO to you!

Dr. Bob