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Dec 4, 2003

Dear Dr. Bob

At first I would like to apologize in advance for any grammatical or expressive mistakes since I am not english-speaking. Also, I am sorry if this is not the right place to post my message but I am a first time visitor.

I found this site tonight and started reading through the archives hoping to get a clearer picture on whether a fully protected, no ejac, oral and anal sex situation I had a few days ago with a stranger of unknown HIV status, was a high-risk one or not. After reading many of the answers posted by you and the other experts here, I decided to write something, neither a question, nor a summary of that situation. Instead, I just want to say two things:

First, I am able to sleep tonight because, through reading answers, I have realised some simple facts, including the negative impact of anxiety on one's judgment and mental state and that no reassurance can be provided by caring and experienced professionals like you over the Internet, which can be as scientifically sound and conclusive as a medical test. Therefore I will not get into the process of describing every single detail about the above-mentioned situation and asking you to provide an answer on what my chances are. I consider anxiety and pre-testing panic attacks (like the one I had a few hours ago) a very serious condition. I have seen that this condition is addressed by you and the other experts in the most caring, yet professional way, that is, by repeatedly urging towards medical testing and psychological counselling / therapy. This is the only thing I am going to do, along with some extra everyday care until I take the test, and refrain from evaluating my chances of having been infected. The way you deal with the issue has drastically and effectively calmed me, as I know it has similarly calmed numerous other worried people.

Second and most important, I find it hard to describe my admiration towards a person such as yourself, who is infected with HIV and at the same time able to say "I am doing well and my relationship could not be better! I am a lucky man!" as you wrote concluding some answer (forgive me if I do not remember your exact words, but I hope readers get the point). I will close this comment by expressing my greatest respect for you, your work and your stance towards life, as well as my compassion for all people having to live with HIV in our world.

All the best

Response from Dr. Frascino


Thank you, thank you, and thank you! I'm amazed (and delighted) you have grasped the essence of our message so quickly and thoroughly, especially considering you found the site for the first time this evening!

Happy Holidays, and I'm sending you my very best karma and luck for your upcoming test, even though your risk is so low that you probably don't need it!

Stay well!

Dr. Bob


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