Response to How Safe if Safe with Poz Boyfriend
Nov 28, 2003
Dr Bob. Your responses to people are such a joy to read. They are full of good advice, humor, honest rebuttals, and solid facts. Your response to "How Safe" was perfect. Nothing more could have been said. The part that you added about the one who is positive also having worries, was right on the mark. I met someone two years ago who is hiv negative (I am positive), and one of the biggest problems we had at the start was not his fears, although he has what I consider a healthy amount of fear for this disease, it was my worries for him. The thought of continuing this line of the disease because of a careless act on my part, kept me from getting too close to anyone. I couldn't get past the idea that if I truly cared for him, how could I put him at even a minimum amount of risk. Talking and listening was how we both were able to get past this and on to developing a life together. Being able to discuss my/his fears openingly, without criticism, no matter how silly some were, was how we were able to come to terms with this part of our life together. I would just like to add that no matter how foolish some of the fears we expressed were, we didn't treat them any less seriously. Because my fear and his fear was real to each of us, an answer that could help us both had to be and was found. Talk it out. Listen and you will come to a place where you both are comfortable. A life with love both physical and emotional can still be had for the hiv positive person. After 13 years positive, waking up healthly and happy is worth a good long Wooooohoooooo! MLH
Response from Dr. Frascino
Thirteen years!?! Bravo! Jan '04 will mark my 13-year anniversary as well! Let's WOO-HOO together. Shall we?
On behalf of all "magnetic couples," thanks for sharing your comments! I couldn't' have said it any better myself!
Here's another milestone: On December 1 (World AIDS Day), Steve and I will celebrate our 10-year anniversary! I really can't even imagine being happier (and I have an extremely vivid imagination!). I have much to be thankful for on this Thanksgiving Day!
Let's both stay healthy and happy, MLH, OK?
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