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Dr. Robert Frascino PLEASE HELP first posted on Jun 4, 2003

Oct 26, 2003

Dear Dr. Bob: Hi this is the worried well guy who wrote to you back in June of this year worrying about my possible exposure to HIV after having druken protected sex with an escort girl on December 30th of last year. After getting multiple negative ELISA, DNA-PCR, RNA viral load tests, and reading your kind response to my question on June 4th titled "Dr. Robert Frascino PLEASE HELP", I finally began to believe my test results even after all the severe symptoms that I gone through which started a week after my possible exposure and lasted for almost a month. My girlfriend who was very supportive throughout my ordeal has always been there for me and it was not until 3 months later that I told here what happened. Unbelievably, she forgave me but there is one thing that makes me fear the worst. A couple of weeks after my encounter with the escort girl I had oral sex and rubbing of my penis with my girlfriends vagina since she's still a virgin, and a few weeks later she got sick with flu like symptoms for almost 2 weeks with symptoms such as a low grade fever of 99-99.5, fatigue, and 2 night sweats. At the time I totally freaked thining that I had infected her with HIV also. This all happened during the winter months which I hope could also be a factor. Ever since the winter she also seems to have developed a sinus problem with a stuffy nose, which became worse in the summer with chronis sinusitis which prevented her from breathing freely while asleep. I brought her to a nose doctor and he prescribed her some antibiotics which she took for about 10 days which opened up her sinuses but she still seems to have chronic stuffy nose. We just got engaged over the summer and I promised her that I would forget the HIV thinking and get my life back on track, but her sinusitis like symptoms just freaks me out and makes me start worrying again. Dr. Bob please provide me with your kind advice for me and my girlfriend (There is no way for my fiancee to get HIV from me if I dont have it right???????) . P.S. After I stopped taking my Effexor and Xanax I developed very small painful white sores on the sides of my tongue which lasted about 3 weeks which made me start freaking out again. I believe that I got some type of bacterial infection from my protected encounter which would cause me to feel burning during urination and pus secretions. I took azithromycin/Cirpo for about 3 weeks which finally took care of this infection. Could this be what is causing my girlfriends chronic stuffy nose.. I also had one more HIV test while I was in Europe at 7 months while in vacation in Europe, and it also came back negative. The counselor told me the kit they used came from Britain and it was accurate, and they even told me there is no way that I had HIV. Is it possible that I may have been exposed to HIV but not infected but still able to pass the virus on to my fiancee.??? Thanks again for your help Dr. Bob you are a saint you are the only one that saved my life back in June since I was totally suicidal at the time. God Bless!

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hi,

I'm not sure going off your Effexor and Xanax was a wise choice as you are still demonstrating classic anxiety symptoms with irrational fears about a disease you could not possibly have.

Try this analogy: Your girlfriend asks you for a million dollars. You don't have a million dollars. Now if your girlfriend comes home driving a new Ferrari, did she buy it with your million dollars? No, of course not. Why not? Because you never had a million dollars to give her in the first place. So, you couldn't possibly have given her a million dollars -- right? So where did the Ferrari come from? That's easy. While you were being an anxious twit perseverating on the impossible, she went out and found herself a rich-dude new boyfriend!

Now get back on your Effexor and Xanax. HIV is definitely not your (or your girlfriend's) problem. If her sinuses are still bothering her, she should see the ENT doctor again. You, on the other hand, should call your shrink for a counseling session. Take the Ferrari; it'll get you there quick!

Dr. Bob



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