Dearest Dr, I am a 30 yr old neg male but i had protected intercourse and UNprotected oral sex (both giving and recieving) to a male 3 weeks ago. Today he rang me to tell me he tested positive for hiv at the gum clinic but the finger test. He is awaiting more results but it looks like he is positive. I obviously am now extremley worried about my own health due to the oral. He did NOT cum in my mouth but there was precum! Please advise me my risks and what does all this mean regarding my health! Many thanks for ur support, A very worried guy. x

Hello Very Worried Guy,

Why is it you only became worried when you found out your boy-toy was virally enhanced? What if he hadn't gone to get tested or got tested but never bothered to inform you? You would still be just as much at risk for HIV. The point is we all need to assume all our sex partners could be HIV infected and therefore take all the necessary measures to prevent HIV transmission. Here in the U.S., twenty-five percent of HIVers have absolutely no idea they are infected with the virus!

As for your risk, "protected intercourse" would indeed be protected, assuming the latex or polyurethane condom was used properly and did not break. Oral sex carries only a very small risk for HIV transmission. The estimated per-act risk for acquiring HIV from unprotected insertive or receptive oral sex with a partner confirmed to be HIV positive is 0.5 and 1 per 10,000 exposures respectively.

To ascertain your definitive HIV status, you'll need to get a single HIV-antibody test at the three-month mark. HIV-antibody tests taken prior to three months are not considered to be conclusive. The odds are very much in your favor that you did not contract HIV from this episode. However, what I do hope you did gain from this experience is a better understanding of HIV transmission and prevention. You can read much more about these topics in the archives. Have a look!

Good luck!

Dr. Bob