My husband has been diagnosed as positive since January 2007 but most probably has had it for well over a decade. We have been through his near death experience with full-blown AIDS and he is now classed as undetectable with a growing CD4 count. So far I remain negative. Our love is stronger than ever. But now that he is undetectable I feel many urges to have unprotected sex with him. My desire to feel my husband inside me is almost unbearable sometimes! I am knowledgeable about the risks - so I know my better senses will not allow it, but there is one thing I would like to give him and that is a first class blow job - like the good old days. If I give him one and he does not come in my mouth what are the risks? I know there is some virus in pre-cum but if he is undetectable isn't it near impossible to be transmitted this way if I have good oral health? Dr. Bob, over to you please!

Hi,

Oral sex carries only a very low risk for HIV transmission/acquisition. However, we can't say there is absolutely zero risk. I would suggest you read through the chapters in the archives titled "Magnetic Couples," "Oral Sex" and "HIV Sexual Transmission." You should find the information encouraging. Certainly now that your husband's viral load has been suppressed to undetectable levels with potent medications, his risk of transmitting the virus is significantly decreased. Many magnetic couples have jointly decided that unprotected oral sex is "safe enough" for them. However, this is an individual decision only you and your husband can make, based on the scientific data and personal comfort levels.

Good luck to you both!

Dr. Bob