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Ask the Experts about Safe Sex and HIV Prevention
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Just for the worried
May 4, 2006

Hello. I was just writing to give a word of comfort to the "hydros". I was one of them just recently and I had an experience that changed my life forever. I am 21, bisexual, and just got over my "in the closet" phase. I have had a lot of partners in the past and always worried about what I was going to get and who gave it to me. I have always had safe sex since i started being sexually active. I think because I have always used it i'm so use to the feeling of late that I would not know what to do if I got some without it. However, despite that i was always safe i still worried everyday constantly and i convinced myself that HIV "magically" got through the latex and into me. It was all in my head. I wasted about 4-5 years of my life worrying constantly everyday instead of just enjoying my youth. A lot of us don't realize that no matter if your positive or negative you should live everyday like it's your last. Cherish every moment and enjoy it because you never know what tomorrow holds. Everyone is so worried about getting this disease but not worrying about when they walk out the door a stray bullet may hit them, or a bus may run off the road and strike them, or when they catch that next flight on American Airlines they may be on the nightly news broadcast. No one thinks about that. I recently tested about 6 times in two months, what a waste of my money. I tested negative. I begged my partner to get tested, he was very convinced that he was negative because he never had any symptoms and he rarely gets sick. I actually get sick way more often than him. We went in for him to take a rapid test and he tested positive. He was totally shocked but really worried more about me leaving him than anything else because he knew how scared i was of it. I was scared at first. It took me weeks to come to reality that this disease is preventable, and we have many great "angels" out there like Dr. Frascino giving us the latest scoops on how to live without being scred everyday. I really appreciate that. I have never been anymore happier with this guy than any other guy i been with. Although he has the disease that I would never want there is ways for me to keep getting it. It's funny that i've always been scared of getting it and everytime I was with a negative person i never slept easy and always worried and worried and worried. Now that i'm with a positive person and I know what we have to do to be safe I'm more comfortable. I never thought it would be this way. My advice to anyone is not to give up a good thing because of something like HIV. There are things out there much worse. Of course you want to do everything you can to prevent it, however you do not have to miss an opportunity of a lifetime beign scared. If your partner is positive go to the doctor with them, ask questions. That helped me out a lot. My partner went to the doctor for his first visit 2 months ago. I went along with him and we got all the condoms and literature we could think of. We could probably open up a shop with all the condoms and lube we got. His vl was 550 and his cd4 is at 600 without any medication and he is doing great. He's the sexiest man i know and he knows it :).

Dr. Frascino I just want to thank you for taking time out your very busy day to answer the questions that everyone has. You have gotten me through a lot and i really really appreciate you and pray that you continue to help the fight against this disease!

Love, Peace, and Hair Grease!!

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello,

Thanks for taking the time to write in and share your story, insights and hair grease.

Magnetic couples often become experts in safer sexual techniques out of necessity. Being a "sexpert" can help keep your relationship passionate, strong and safe.

Stay safe. Stay well. By the way, your greased hair looks marvelous.

Dr. Bob



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