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Should I tell my partner?
Jul 25, 2000

I recently found out I was HIV + and am in a quandary about whether to tell my partner. If I do I am terrified it will be the end of the relationship and then I will be alone. I don't feel that it would be impossible to get another partner but I now find myself in a situation whereby I have to ask myself "Do I tell her? Don't I?" It would be better if I do but somehow I wonder if it should not come out naturally? Maybe I should wait until I get sick and then the truth will be revealed.

Can you help me?

Response from Mr. Shernoff

Only the truth can help you. How can you even consider continuing in a relationship that is not based on honesty? This does not say very much for how you feel about your partner. You are so very self-involved right now that it takes my breath away. Of course it will be scary, but if this is a good relationship it will weather this crisis. There is no way it can survive your dishonesty.

Michael Shernoff, MSW



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