Advertisement
The Body: The Complete HIV/AIDS Resource
Follow Us Follow Us on Facebook Follow Us on Twitter Download Our App
Professionals >> Visit The Body PROThe Body en Espanol
   
Ask the Experts About

Mental Health and HIVMental Health and HIV
          
Rollover images to visit our other forums!
Recent AnswersAsk a Question
  
  • Email Email
  • Glossary Glossary


Serodiscordant couple
Oct 15, 2013

Hi,

I'm HIV-, and in a relationship with an HIV+ man. He's always been open about it and told me right from when we started dating that he's positive.

We both studied a lot about this matter of course, and we both know where we stand, so that's not an issue. The issue is that my partner basically locks down when we're getting more physical. We talked about it and he's afraid he'll infect me. I know the risks, and we didn't take any risks at all, but it still scares him.

I know it's because he loves me and doesn't want to hurt me, but it's not exactly easy for us.

Can you explain how to go further? How to break the fear?

Thank you

Response from Dr. Fawcett

Thanks for writing. Serodiscordant couples often experience a dynamic which you have noted: a great fear on the part of the positive partner about infecting the other person. There are very few resources for such couples. Here in Ft. Lauderdale we have just started a program for couples that discusses the risks, expression of feelings, and couples' communication skills.

I would suggest finding a couple's therapist who is familiar with HIV. He/she can help you understand the risks (for example, if he is undetectable such risk significantly drops), as well as your tolerance to certain behaviors. Couples often want black and white answers about what is safe and what is not. Reality is, unfortunately, more complex. A professional could also help you both work on expression of feelings in order to remove any barriers to deeper intimacy.

Here is a page from TheBody that has good resource information about serodiscordant couples.

I wish you both well,

David



Previous
Atripla and Seroquel
Next
CD4 and pregnancy

  
  • Email Email
  • Glossary Glossary

 Get Email Notifications When This Forum Updates or Subscribe With RSS


 
Advertisement



Q&A TERMS OF USE

This forum is designed for educational purposes only, and experts are not rendering medical, mental health, legal or other professional advice or services. If you have or suspect you may have a medical, mental health, legal or other problem that requires advice, consult your own caregiver, attorney or other qualified professional.

Experts appearing on this page are independent and are solely responsible for editing and fact-checking their material. Neither TheBody.com nor any advertiser is the publisher or speaker of posted visitors' questions or the experts' material.

Review our complete terms of use and copyright notice.

Powered by ExpertViewpoint

Advertisement