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Nov 2, 2005

I had sex with a prostitute while away from home. I've been with my wife 10 years without any incident. Never even a stray kiss. I love her and feel like I've destroyed everything. On top of all this, I've betrayed my 10 mos old baby. I have been tested, but with the incident so fresh it will be 3-6 months before a test is conclusive. I feel like if I tell her, my family is ruined. If I don't tell her then I put her at risk for infection, which would be devistating to her and my baby. What should I do??

Response from Dr. Horwath

You only place your wife at risk of HIV infection if you have unprotected sex with her. Casual contact, including kissing, will not transmit HIV infection.

Meanwhile, it doesn't take 3-6 months to get an accurate HIV-antibody test. The screening test, called ELISA, is extremely sensitive, but the antibodies produced do not appear immediately after infection. An infected person may test ELISA negative during a "window period" that varies in length from a few weeks to a few months after infection, depending on the individual case and type of used. So if you are tested 2 months after your exposure, the result should be quite accurate.

Spanish version of HIV Dementia Scale

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