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Ist this denial?

Oct 31, 2003

Hello and first thank you for the useful work you make for all of us.

I was diagnosed HIV+ 2 monthes ago , i've been living with my HIV partner for 12 years. We have a very deep and loving relationship.

Now I've the feeling that he doesn't realize that I have HIV, he continues planning for the far future and just says everything will be OK. Is that denial? Am I exagerating when I say I may be dead or disabled in 5 or ten years? Should we continue or relationship "as usual"? Greetings from germany

Response from Mr. Shernoff

While your partner may be in denial, it is not denial if you both are healthy and responding well to antiretroviral meds (if you are taking them) to plan for a long future. For many people living with HIV it is a chronic and long term illness, that does not mean that it is not a serious and still life threatening illness. For many people planning for a future helps create the reality that they strive to live to fulfill. Denial would be operative if either ignored the enormous uncertainty that accompanies living with HIV.

Michael Shernoff, MSW

whats wrong with me

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