|I think I have done the unforgivable
Nov 24, 2009
I think I have done the unforgivable. I am in a commited relationship(almost 6 years) with a fantastic girl. For some idiotic reason I cheated on her with a guy I met online. I preceded over the course of a couple months to peform unprotected fellatio on him(only, no anal). The last time I saw him was in august. Around mid september (2-3 weeks later)I started getting dry mouth and my gf got a few cankersores. Her sores went away but my dry mouth has persisted. Then a couple weeks ago(November (a month and a half later)) we both started getting very congested hacking up phlegm every morning. This turned into a nagging cough for her. Since my fears became elevated I have dabilating anxiety. I now feel weak and feverish all day, I have night sweats. How could I possibly tell the woman who has made a monogamous commitment to me that I have cheated on her and now infected her with HIV. I am disgusted with myself and am feeling suicidal. I talked to the guy today and he said he was tested 2 weeks ago and it was negative(around 3 months after our last encounter). This is of know consilation to me as with all my anxious reading I know it can take up to 6 months before antibodies show up. I am going in tomorrow to get tested myself but I might chicken out. I think I would rather die than have to tell her I gave her HIV! Every moment we are together, everytime I hear her cough drives me to fever and my heart feels like its going to explode. I don't know what you can tell me. I just need someone to talk to.
Worst Person Ever
Response from Dr. Frascino
This forum is dedicated to HIV-positive folks, particularly those who have concerns related to fatigue and/or anemia. Questions related to HIV transmission, prevention, safer sex, HIV testing and risk should be sent to Dr. Bob at his "Safe Sex and HIV Prevention" expert forum. Please resubmit your question there using the same title and add the phrase, "resubmitted form the Fatigue and Anemia Forum." Thank you.
I know the answer...but your confirmation would be greatly appreciated
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