|Tired Mother - wants to donate
Apr 9, 2006
Now the question. I made some terrible mistake. Lots of unprotected v sex - many unknown serostatus partners, in the dark time of 1985 - 1990. THOUGHT I was tested in 1992 - wrong !!! Just found out. I WAS however tested (after a severe amount of weight loss and all the symptoms - no offense. 1996 Negative elisa. I was not at the time aware of any other tests - nor did I push the issue as I ASSUMED (you know the phrase) that I was tested. Oh in a monagumus (sp?) relationship since 1991 - had a baby in 93 - no test offered - again because of what I assumed - didn't push the testing issue. Had another baby in 1998 - tested again presurgery in 2000 - negative elisa- recently had pneumonia, abdominal issues, wasting, sunken eyes, fever, severe anxiety attacks again tested this year - negative elisa. Because of my anxiety and hiv ID doc suggested quantitative rna - waiting for the results. I cannot stop worrying - still having night sweats ( pneumonia gone) my eyes are sunken my head - I'm so scared for my kids. I recently started bi-polar treatment. Could I have aids and that's why tests are negative and now my kids have it - I breastfed all three. Please respond. I'm a mom and being very truthful (about test results). Please help me. It's been a long time - don't want them to pay for my sins.
A fellow italian catholic mother
Response from Dr. Frascino
Hello "Fellow Italian Catholic Mother",
First off, I am indeed a "fellow Italian" and I did even attend "Catholic" grade school (up to 3rd grade when the school burned down not my fault, no matter what you might hear from Sister Missionary Position), but I really can't qualify for the "mother" part. Nonetheless, I'm happy to respond to your concerns. As for some terrible mistakes in the late eighties, join the club! You are certainly not alone. We all have lapses in judgment. Some of mine would probably curl your hair (if it's not already curly). But despite whatever indiscretions you may have had, you subsequently have had negative ELISA test in 1996, 2000 and 2006. Those tests are conclusive and definitive. You are absolutely HIV negative. No ifs, ands or buts!
I'm absolutely sure your quantitative RNA-PCR will be negative as well. Could you have AIDS as a reason for your negative ELISA test? No, absolutely not.
I cannot diagnose the cause of your symptoms over the Internet; however, one thing I can tell you is that HIV is definitely not the cause. No way. No how.
Hopefully you treatment for bipolar disorder will help with some of your fears. Counseling may also help you confront and conquer these unwarranted fears of HIV/AIDS. As for the Catholic guilt stuff . . . well . . . personally, I've come to believe that the higher powers are not vindictive. Otherwise I would have been struck by a lightening bolt years ago.
Feel better, Mamma Mia, OK?! And remember HIV is not your problem!
Happy Easter, Dr. Bob
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