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Wife scared hubby infected
Oct 5, 1999

Doctor, My husband and I have just learned he has been infected with the Hiv virus. I am scared to continue to have sex with him. What are some ways to have safe sex and help me to understand what is happening to a 27 yr old marriage? Any help would be appreciated.

Response from Dr. Remien

You obviously have many questions that require not only basic information, but also many levels of discussion between you and your husband. "Safer sex' is pretty basic and essentially involves protection from the direct sharing of body fluids. More explicit information can be easily obtained from this website or from any local HIV community based or health service organization in your area. However, when you ask about "what is happening to a 27 year old marriage," I think you are asking about a whole lot more. Namely, you have a lot of questions of your husband about the origin of his infection and its implications for your relationship. These are not easy things to address but need to be, if your relationship is to continue. If it is too hard for you to talk about these things on your own, please seek a counselor that can facilitate these challenging, but important discussions.

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