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3 years positive in 9yr rel w/HIV-
Jun 19, 2004

I am 38 and have been in a monogamous relationship with a man 68 for more than 9 years. about 3 years ago i was hospitalized with PCP and it was revealed that i was HIV+. My partner is strictly oral. I know that there is risk in oral sex. He doesn't mind but i do. I do not want the chance or responsibily of infecting anyone. He continues to test negative despite having dated an HIV+ person (who has since passed) a couple of years before i met him. By nature i have always tended to go for long periods without sex but i do not wish to have a sexless relationship for the remainder of my life. I need help addressing this issue. Thank you.

Response from Dr. Remien

Most people are not interested in having "sexless" relationships. And as you can see from a lot of the other questions on this forum most couples find ways to have satisfying sexual relationships even when they are of mixed status. That however, is the challenge for many. Both of you need to be comfortable with the sex you choose to have. Keep talking about it, but also don't be afraid to love and live your lives together.


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