My husband was diagnosed HIV poz a few years ago. We were not together at that time, and he didn't tell me until 2-3 years later. I got tested with a negative result. After that first time, I have retested about 4 times already, still with a negative result. We are back together and have protected sex, although not all the time. I have gotten to the point to literally beg him to use a condom, but he replies with a "I won't cum inside." I love my husband dearly, but don't want to get infected, obviously. What can I say or do to make him understand that his illness is a very serious one and he should take it as such? I have no idea what to say or do that won't offend him. Please help me!!!

While this is not an easy situation, you need to know that your concerns are entirely legitimate. And if he loves and cares about you he needs to pay attention to your concerns and should share them as well. Consistent and correct condom use is an excellent means of preventing transmission of HIV from him to you. You should not be ashamed of wanting to protect yourself. HIV is still a serious disease and the risk of transmitting HIV to you is real if sex is unprotected, even if he says he will not "cum inside of you." I encourage you to be assertive and clear about your concerns with him. I wonder how he really would feel if he were to infect you - have you asked him? If it is really difficult for you to have this kind of dialogue with him I suggest you seek the help of a counselor who is experienced in both HIV related issues and couples counseling. And certainly if there has been coercion and/or abuse on his part, or if you fear this, you must seek counseling and guidance from a professional. He has no right to put your health at risk for the sake of his own pleasure. I hope that you and he can address this issue with mutual love and caring.