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scared.....but still doing it
Jul 4, 2002

Robert, My partner whom I started dating 7 months ago was recently diagnosed with hiv in March. Despite this I plan on staying with him. I am hiv far as of March I like anal insertive and condoms irritate my butt beyond belief no matter the brand. With that said...I have been barebacking ..needless to say.and yes I KNOW BETTER...He does not precum, and has never ejaculated in my butt. His viral load is basically undetectable and I never noticed blood after sex. I just feel like its ok as long as his viral load is undetectable. I need to know is how easy is it for me to become infected with no real exchange in fluids. Thanks for you time ....and your site

Response from Dr. Remien

It seems like people are always looking for guarantees about safety and justifications for engaging in sexual risk behaviors. And like you, many people do not like to always use condoms (or other protection) for a lot of reasons. While risk of transmission may be reduced when viral load is reduced, transmission is still possible. Remember, "undetectable" viral load simply means that it is lower than the sensitivity of the test used to measure copies of the virus. There is still virus present and it is always replicating. Also, the viral load that is measured is the viral load in the plasma (blood) which may not be the same as the viral load of genital secretions.

People need to understand the risks that are present and then make their decisions accordingly. You need to balance pleasure with relative risk and decide for yourselves what you and your partner are comfortable with.

I am neg. My girlfriend is HIV+
Transmission Risk

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